If you didn't keep telling us about your gods, we wouldn't keep laughing at them.
You're in a Toxic Relationship. Get Out.
Uh Huh…
Yes Virginia, You Are
Fuck Ted Cruz
She's Such a Fucking Cunt
Right?
Brilliant!
Fuck This Guy
On Behalf of the State That Brought You Paul Gosar…
…I apologize to the rest of the country for the idiots we somehow keep electing.
Funny How That Works, Isn't It?
Not All Heroes Wear Capes
So Many Feelings
Exactly.
Where's The Lie?
That's Not How Any Of This Works
Asking for a Friend
It's Called Respect
Or as the late Joan Rivers was fond of saying, "Oh grow up!"
Sounds Perfectly Legit
Pumpkinheads
Dead and already rotting; hollow and empty with a hole in your head; a grotesque false grin; completely unnatural; aping and appropriating pagan traditions; forced by someone else to be something you were never intended to be; the light existing independent of you being a pumpkin, and placed inside you actually creates more shadows; irrelevant and unnecessary the overwhelming majority of the time.
When you realize something can be both completely fucking mental and completely fucking accurate at the same time.
What's Your Opinion of Religion Used in Horror Movies?
Perfect place for it. Makes those movies super-creepy.
Especially considering the fact it's "real" – in the sense that people believe it in the real world, and think it's good, while nobody thinks Michael Myers actually exists.
It's a horror story we're surrounded by, not just something the writers came up with for the film. With menacing symbols, demented rituals, blood-thirsty villains masquerading as benevolent, and a pervasive sense of fear that permeates the world of the faithful.
Not to mention centuries of horrific death, torture and destruction it has already wrought that forms a long, sordid tradition of bloody prequels.
The Dark Lord Yahweh is perhaps the most popular horror story villain of all time. Not very well written, but astonishingly successful nonetheless.
[source]
Ya Think?
Even Better Than "FBI Surveillance Van"
I wish I could think of this stuff!
Please Grow Up
Somewhere in Heaven…
Dear Theists…
Before you take it upon yourself to tell me that I have no morals and will burn in Hell for all eternity for not believing in whatever god you've selected, please do me a favor:
Go outside on a clear night, away from city lights, and look up at the heavens. Try to visualize the vastness of our solar system, which orbits a single star. Now picture that our sun is merely one of the 300 billion stars that form our galaxy, the Milky Way. Finally, consider that the Milky Way is just one of billions of galaxies that span the universe.
When you have done this, you will have come close to comprehending the enormity of the fuck I don't give about your archaic, bigoted, and infantile opinions about creation and the way I choose to love my life.
Sincerely,
An Atheist