Category: Beating Back the St00pid

…that this is my blog, where I express my opinions. If you don't like what you read, by all means please don't visit—or better yet, go start your own blog. The last thing in the world I would want is for you to unnecessarily get all worked up by reading something you don't agree with. I'm sure you can find dozens—if not hundreds—of websites that will agree with your viewpoint. Remember, the internet is huge.

The minute I saw this on Facebook I knew it would only be a matter of hours until the crybabies over at NOM would be organizing a boycott of General Mills.  Right on cue, they got on their equality-supporting Apples and Microsofts (no mention ever of them giving up those modern conveniences) and fired off a missive demanding that the company withdraw their support for gay pride. And—much like what happened with their ever-so-successful boycott of Starbucks, GM's stock immediately went up.

Bravo, NOM!  Maybe one of your men of god will purchase a few boxes of cereal and dump the down the sewer the way one of them did with his cup of Starbucks.

Today they thoughtfully published the brands they were boycotting, and all I can say to the hateful idiot bigots is THANKS.  I have next week's shopping list.

…from your friends at Monsanto!

Oh, I don't think so.

• Democrats haven't banned the teaching of Mexican history (Arizona).
• They didn't call a young lawyer who spoke before Congress a "slut" (Limbaugh).
• They don't question the findings of 97% of the world's scientists that global warming is real.
• They aren't trying to suppress voters.
• They don't believe child labor is a fine idea (Gingrich).
• They don't consider ketchup (Reagan) or pink slime a "vegetable" in school lunches.
• They don't support the idea that women shouldn't receive equal pay for equal work. (Republican Congress).
• Or that women should be forced to have ultrasounds or other medical interventions before choosing to have an abortion (Texas).
• They don't believe anyone who looks Hispanic should be stopped in the street and forced to show papers (Arizona).
• They don't think privatizing Social Security will be a "great deal" for the elderly (Romney).
• They don't think gay people are destroying traditional marriage.
• They don't believe corporations are people (Supreme Court).
• They don't think any one faith should take precedence over another (Religious Right).
• They don't believe that creationism (a religious belief) should be taught side-by-side with natural selection (science).
• They don't think all taxation is bad (Tea Party).
• They don't think ILLEGAL Wall Street shenanigans should go unpunished.
• They don't see the benefits of empty "trickle-down" promises that have NEVER been realized.
• They don't believe women who've been raped should be forced to carry a child that results from that rape (Santorum).
• They don't think it's wise to open National Parks to developers looking to make a buck.
• They don't think that parking American corporate profits overseas to avoid paying taxes shows much dedication to America.
• They don't think teachers are overpaid.
• They don't think it's wise to allow people to carry guns and use them unless there's a damn clear reason.
• They don't like the idea of unregulated industry, given that it's recently brought us to the brink of Depression.
• They remember what dangerous, shoddy products existed before there were laws for safety.
• They don't think college students should be burdened with high-interest loan rates.
• They don't think people protesting should be sprayed and beaten.
• They don't resent the poor.
• They don't think Obama is a Muslim.

Right on cue, One Million Moms, the Harpy Division of the hate group American Family Association, is foaming at the mouth because of JC Penney's Father's Day Sale Flyer.

And they are very, very, disturbed:

"One Million Moms (OMM) is disturbed that JC Penney's (JCP) is continuing down the same path of promoting sin in their advertisements. In JCP's June catalog, there is another homosexual ad, but this time with two dads celebrating Father's Day. The advertising booklet began arriving in mailboxes yesterday. If their marketing department follows the same plan they did in May, this mailer will be available to view on their website on June 1.

"The ad shows two men on the floor playing and hugging their two children at home. It reads, 'First Pals – What makes Dad so cool? He's the swim coach, tent maker, best friend, bike fixer and hug giver – all rolled into one. Or two. Real-life dads Todd Koch and Cooper Smith with their children Claire and Mason.'

"It is obvious that JCP would rather take sides than remain neutral in the culture war. JCP will hear from the other side so they need to hear from us as well. Our persistence will pay off! One day we will answer for our actions or lack of them. We must remain diligent and stand up for Biblical values and truth. Scripture says multiple times that homosexuality is wrong, and God will not tolerate this sinful nature.

"OMM will continue to avoid shopping at JCP until they take a neutral stand. If you receive their advertising booklets or catalogs in the mail, OMM recommends you write "REFUSED…RETURN TO SENDER" on your JCPenney catalog and try sending them back. If they receive an onslaught of their returned magazines, they will take notice. Also, you may email, call, or use their contact form on their website to unsubscribe from their mailers so you will no longer have these delivered to your home. If you have a store credit card, you can close your account, if you have not already done so, to help get the message across that you have no plans to shop with them in the future. Be sure to tell them why you are unsubscribing and canceling your credit card."

Poor babies. They don't even know you can't return Third Class mail. And seriously, how many of the One Dozen Shrews shop at JCP anyway?

If they keep boycotting every company that embraces marriage equality, pretty soon they won't be able to set foot outside their homes.

But wait…isn't staying at home supposed to be their place according to their Big Book O'Bullshit?

Being the godless deviant that I am, I used their own complaint form to tell them what I thought about their little temper tantrum. Feel free to do the same yourself.

Hello Moms,

Thanks for drawing my attention to the new JC Penney Catalog that shows a HO-MO-SEXUAL family WITH CHILDREN! Oh my LORD!  When I saw it I was flabbergasted! I was like: OMG! I have to tell EVERYONE I know about this! But first I got right on the phone and called the local JC Penny Store, emailed their corporate marketing department (again, thanks for the link, you're so helpful!) and THANKED THEM for EMBRACING EQUALITY. Not only that, I sent your helpful links to all my friends on Facebook and Twitter and Reddit and Foursquared and my e-mail list and told them that they all need to contact Penney's and commend them as well.  And on Saturday we're planning a big gay SHOP AT PENNEY'S party at our mall.

With any luck Penny's stock will soar just like Starbuck's did when you boycotted them.

Keep up the good work!  I hear that your other boycotts have been so successful in increasing profits for the businesses that you Target (get it? Target?) that they're all like PLEASE BOYCOTT US MOMMIES! PLEASE? PLEASE? I love it.

BTW, did you know that the companies who design and build the computer hardware and software you're using also embrace EQUALITY? How soon can we expect a statement that you've destroyed all your computers and have gone back to using a tools more suited to your Bronze Age mentality, like stone tablets and smoke signals?

I do have one other question for you: what's it like to live a life so consumed with hate for your fellow human beings that you're blinded to anything else?  And don't give me that "hate the sin but love the sinner" bullshit. Based on recent public statements by some of your fellow "Christians," it's clear you don't just want to prevent gays from participating in the full rights and responsibilities of United States citizens; you want us dead.

Hitler had the same idea about the Jews.

"Oh, but that was different…"

No it wasn't. It was HATE, pure and simple. And you and your cronies are the face of it in these early years of the 21st Century. Think about that.

Well-known hate group leader Tony Perkins hopes Dan Savage will see the light and embrace Christ as his Savior. He even prays for it.

"I would put out this challenge to folks who are listening: to put Dan Savage on the top of your prayer list and pray for him because I believe he has the potential to be a modern day Saul of Tarsus. I mean, just think if the Lord got a hold of his heart and changed him and turned him from persecuting Christians to being an advocate of Christianity and morality, what a huge impact that would have. So don't get angry at Dan Savage; he's doing what people do when they're lost. Pray for him that he would see the light, be blinded by the light, and come to know Christ as his personal savior."

Dan responds:

"Oh, Tony. If quoting their own scriptures to Christians amounts to 'persecuting Christians,' then every Baptist minister in the country is guilty of persecuting Christians. And Saul of Tarsus? That would be Paul, of course, author of huge chunks of the New Testament and the creep responsible for its most misogynistic and homophobic bits. (Jesus didn't say anything about homosexuality, and Jesus never asked his mother or Mary Magdalene to 'keep silent.')

"Paul was a tortured closet case, which is the kind of Christian I would have to be to meet with the approval of someone like Tony Perkins. You know, a Christian in the style of Marcus Bachmann or Ted Haggard or Benedict XVI. And let's not forget what 'I'll pray for you' means someone like Perkins says it:

"Everyone knows, 'I'll pray for you,' is how Baptists say, 'Fuck you.'

"Fuck you too, Tony"