Category: Cinema

For the life of me I don't know why it isn't in my permanent collection.

Details.

30 years since the world heard Sigourney Weaver utter those immortal words. How time flies.

While Aliens didn't creep me out nearly as much as the original Alien, I still remember coming home after seeing it opening night and turning on all the lights in my apartment.

Well that was unnecessary.

Traveler, by Simon Brown.

The problem with these shorts is they leave you wanting MORE!

…I rolled my eyes.

But I have to admit that after seeing the trailer, I think it might be kinda cool.

Kenneth Anger's Lucifer Rising:

And yet, I couldn't tear my eyes away. So. Much. 1968. Haight-Ashbury.

This gave me chills.

I mean, look at that. Already there's fan-inspired art from a film that hasn't even been released yet.

Seeing those AT-AT walkers looming on the horizon should send my heart fluttering the way they did on that Cinemascope screen in 1980. But they just aren't. And it's all George Lucas's fault.

I turned 19 shortly after Star Wars originally hit the theaters in May 1977. (You do the math. I'm old.) So while I wasn't a child per se, it nonetheless fired my imagination in a way that was to carry well into my adulthood. Surprisingly, initially I had no real desire to see the film, but a friend from high school dragged me to it one hot summer afternoon a couple weeks after its release, telling me it might just change my life. And it did.

As I'm sure I've written before, I came out of the theater that afternoon high, and it wasn't from any pharmaceuticals. Star Wars set me on what I refer to now as nothing less than a spiritual quest. While I know this isn't even close to being a record for total number of screenings, during the next year that it was parked at the old Cine Capri in Phoenix, I saw the film 30 more times. (I remember being outraged when they raised the price of a ticket from $2.75 to $3.00!)

When The Empire Strikes Back opened (again, at the Cine Capri) three years later, I wasn't about to be caught with my pants down as I had been with its predecessor. I was in line opening night, rushing over immediately after work to join the crowd of other fans in line wanting to get their first glimpse at that galaxy far, far away.

I didn't see Empire nearly as many times as Star Wars. Thinking back, it was probably only a dozen or so, but it wasn't because I didn't like the film. Quite the contrary, I loved how the story was progressing.

Three years later, I was now living in Tucson so I didn't get to see Return of the Jedi at my preferred venue in Phoenix, but I was still there opening day. Anticipating more huge lines, I called out sick that morning and dragged my friend Lee along (who, by the way, found it appalling that I would play hookie for a movie). As it turned out, there was a line, but nowhere near as long as what I'd been expecting, and we were actually able to get into the first showing without any difficulty.

My reaction? Meh. Jedi was okay, but I overall I came away from it disappointed. Even then I thought it was the weakest of the three films. And the Ewoks were abominable. I should've seen the writing on the wall that Lucas had become more concerned with merchandising than actually telling a good story. Yes, it wrapped up the Skywalker-Vader saga and the rebels scored a significant victory against the Empire, but what next?

What came next—at least for me personally—was a relocation to San Francisco. When the tenth anniversary of the first film came around in 1987, one of the theaters in the North Bay threw a party and showed all three films at one sitting. I went because there were rumors that stars from the films would be in attendance, and even ten years later I still had a tremendous crush on Mark Hamill. Sadly, those rumors proved false, but it was still interesting to see all three films at one time, and while I didn't leave with a Hamill autograph, I did walk away from the experience with a cool Tenth Anniversary sweatshirt.

Sidebar: I actually did run into Mr. Hamill—and his wife and son—on the F-Line in San Francisco many years later. We locked eyes, and I nodded as if to say, "I know who you are but I will respect your privacy and leave you alone," and exchanged smiles. It was kind of an anti-climactic encounter considering I'd known since he first appeared on that screen in 1977 that eventually our paths would cross.

Flash forward to May 1999 and what I now refer to as "George Lucas's ass-raping of my young adulthood" or as the rest of the world calls it, "The arrival of the Star Wars prequels."

I'm not going to say much about these three films (or Lucas's tinkering and reissue of the original trilogy) since so many words have been spilled over the last decade regarding the casting, acting, directing, make-your-eyes-bleed use of CGI, and all that midichlorian nonsense, but I will say they soured me to the idea of ever seeing another new Star Wars film lest the few remaining vestiges of my wide-eyed youth get ground into a bloody pulp.

That being said, I am curious about Episode VII: The Force Awakens. Curious. Not champing-at-the-bit I-can't-wait-to-see it level of excitement as might've been the case if Episodes 1-3 had never happened, but curious. I haven't kept up with any of the Star Wars spin-off stories, books, or animated series; I have no idea who any of these new characters are, but with only minimal Lucas involvement and J.J. Abrams at the helm—and the use of practical effects vs. CGI—I'm at least a little hopeful that it won't be the giant steaming pile of Banta poodoo that the Prequels were.

I am not a fan per se of the YA Dystopia genre, but I love both the Hunger Games as well as the original Maze Runner films. I've actually only read the Maze Runner books, however, so I was very excited to hear that they were going to film the entire series.

HOWEVER, after seeing Scorch Trials yesterday, I am sadly disappointed. It's been over a year since I last read the book, so I was questioning my own memory of it, but I kept scratching my head throughout the screening saying to Ben on several occasions, "I don't remember this being in the book."

In fact, going back and looking at its Wikipedia page to refresh my memory after we got home, I realized how very little of The Scorch Trials book was actually in the film. Yeah, they followed the basic structure of the story, but beyond that it was a mess. I know all movies adapted from books have to make changes, either to condense the story to fit in the allotted running time or to increase dramatic effect, but this seemed to be a wholesale reaming of the source material, only to be replaced with "let's pull some shit out of our ass and see if this works instead."

It didn't.

Just as an example, the characters' breakout of the WICKED dormitory in the first act wasn't prompted by an attack of Cranks (aggressive, zombie-like people who have been infected with a virus known as "the flare" for those of you unfamiliar with the books) on the suddenly-deserted facility as it was in the book, but rather their snooping around the heavily armed and populated installation itself and learning the reason they were brought there. There was none of the feeling of mystery and bewilderment of the book (and previous film) in this movie that involved you in the story and made you want to know what was going on.

In the book, they find one remaining scientist in the facility who tells them they've all been infected with the virus and have two weeks to get through "the scorch" and to a safe haven to get the cure. None of that was in the movie. The main reason prompting the characters to get through the scorch was REMOVED from the film.

And it only goes downhill from there.

I want to go back and read the book again to clear my mental palate.

Why the filmmakers chose to discard—wholesale—the main storyline of the book is beyond me, and this does not bode well for the final film, The Death Cure, scheduled to be released in February 2017.

I count the original Maze Runner film among my favorites, but if you're a fan of the series my advice would be to save your money on this one and wait for it to show up on cable—and even then, prepare to say, "WTF?!"

I stumbled across Trick on television tonight. I used to count this among my top ten favorite movies, but for some reason I found it difficult to watch tonight, and ended up turning it off after only about twenty minutes.

Perhaps it's because so much has happened in my life—and the world in general—since it came out sixteen years ago. If there was ever an indication that I am not the same man I was in 1999, it's my quite unexpected reaction to this seeing this movie again after all that time.

I—like undoubtedly hundreds (if not thousands) of other gay men—had a huge crush on JP Pitoc at the time, fantasizing that at some point I'd have my very own sweet and sexy go-go boy wanting me for all the right reasons. Not surprisingly, I could never have predicted at the time that I would have a sweet and sexy man arrive in my life only a few short years later; someone far more real and amazing than the fictitious Mark could ever be.

And a quick Google search shows that Mr. Pitoc has not aged well. And that's sad.

We saw Man from U.N.C.L.E. today.

From the trailer it looked fun…

…and it didn't disappoint.

I remember the television series from when I was a kid, but I don't recall ever actually watching much of it. Perhaps it was because the storylines were too adult, or it lacked the cool gadgets of Mission Impossible or the silly, slapstick humor of Get Smart. In any case I can't draw any comparisons between the old and new.

The movie got off to a rather slow start, but as Ben pointed out, I think that's because they needed to do some character building before getting into the heat of the action. It picked up the pace about a third of the way in, and it was a great combination of thrills and sly humor from there on out.

Of course, it didn't hurt that the leads—Arnie Hammer and Henry Cavill—were hot as hell. Annie especially conjures impure thoughts; very impure thoughts.

When the film ended it left me wanting more, and I always consider that an accurate indicator of how good a movie is. (But then, I was among the dozen or so people on the planet who liked Jupiter Ascending, so take it for what you will.) Naturally, the story was was left open for a sequel, and I for one look forward to sharing more adventures with Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin.

So much awesome…

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