I'm Going to Hell

"You have the best beard."
"No, you have the best beard."
"I do not. You do."
"No Silly, you have the best beard."
"Oh STOP. You have the best beard!"

I'm Going To Hell


"Well that's just GREAT. Thanks to you, my husband has to sit on a fucking donut pillow all the way to Albuquerque because you didn't use any lube! And by the way, your restrooms are filthy."

I'm Going To Hell

"Can you get one for me too? Old man Saunders grabbed my ass yesterday and it's going straight into his IV tonight. He's got the diabeetus, y'know."