There Will Always Be A Britain
When will we do this?!”
This Isn’t Going Away, Part Infinity
Cankles, This Isn’t Going Away No Matter What You Do
Because Trumplethinskin Will Claim Not To Know Prince Andrew Today
I’ll Bet They’re Relieved
What’s Next?
Quote Of The Day
Quote Of The Day
Thomas Massie, Republican Representative from Kentucky, on the power behind the Epstein coverup:
“Last night I received a flash drive containing the complete list of files belonging to Jeffrey Epstein. Everything is there: every billionaire, every campaign donor, every single person. Now let me explain why you haven’t heard anything about this in the media. Because they’re all in there. They will do everything to prevent these documents from being made public. Epstein was far more than just a pedophile; he was an intelligence asset. He was part of a blackmail operation used to control billionaires, politicians, and world leaders. If this list ever sees the light of day, the system as we know it will collapse. The public has the right to know the truth, and I am not afraid to share it.”
Do it.
Share it all.
[Source]
The Fuck You Are
Vomiting It All Up
Last Summer…
…the Tarot card readers (yeah, yeah I know) that I occasionally stumble across on YouTube warned that when all this Epstein shit came all came out it would be much, much worse than we ever imagined. It seems that—unlike their predictions for a landslide victory for Kamala Harris—they were right about this.
Just when I think I can’t hate him any more than I already do, I constantly find myself re-evaluating that stance.
Period.
Hair Füror: “Don’t you know a joke when you hear one?”
Don’t panic. This is just another attempt to distract from the Epstein files (which are now nearly a year beyond the date set by Congress for full release.)
From Mock Paper Scissors:
The Orange told Reuters that he’s doing such a good job that “when you think of it, we shouldn’t even have an election.”
Semi-sentient jar of Mayonnaise Karoline Leavitt soon walked it back, insisting he was “simply joking.”
Hair Füror is such a kidder, he enjoys a good laugh at his own expense, amirite?
Anyway, yesterday when we talking about it, I only mentioned how cancelling the elections would cause the government to stop functioning, but I left out all the reasons why Hair Füror cannot cancel the elections,I probably should not have been so fast.
(But we’ve talked about it many times, too).
That said, Taegan Goddard has enumerated the many reasons in his email thingie to paid subscribers, and breaking protocol, here’s what he said:
The president has no authority to cancel elections. Federal elections are governed by the Constitution and federal law, but they are administered by the states. There is no executive order, emergency declaration, or legal loophole that allows a president to simply call them off.
Elections are decentralized by design. The United States doesn’t have a single national election authority. Elections are run by 50 states and thousands of local jurisdictions. Secretaries of state, county clerks, and local election boards do not report to the White House — and they can’t be ordered to “stand down.”
Congress can’t be forced to cooperate. Even if Trump wanted to nullify elections in practice, there is no mechanism to compel Republican members of Congress to resign, suspend terms, or support canceling elections.
The logistics make it unworkable. Elections involve tens of thousands of polling places, millions of ballots, and armies of local workers and volunteers. There is no realistic way for a president to shut down that infrastructure nationwide.
That’s why off-year elections, special elections, and local contests continue to move forward regardless of what Trump says. The system is intentionally fragmented to prevent exactly this kind of abuse.
Trump can complain about elections. He can delegitimize them rhetorically. He can try to undermine trust in the results.
But actually stopping them? That’s a very different thing.
I’m just not worried about that; I know I’m always warning people to not confuse actual scandals with distractions, but this was a distraction.
He’s Not Wrong!
Yup.
Since He Has To Put His Name On Everything…
OMG!
From Mock Paper Scissors:
OK, guys, this is gross and I’m sorry/not sorry to be writing about it, but it is important.
Yikes – no wonder the DOJ is scrambling to tell us not to believe what’s in the files about Trump.
www.mediaite.com/media/news/o…
— The Tennessee Holler (@thetnholler.bsky.social) December 23, 2025 at 6:50 AM
CNN has more on the Epstein-Nassar letter here, but here’s the important part:
“Dear L.N.,” the letters reads, “As you know by now, I have taken the ‘short route’ home. Good luck! We shared one thing … our love and caring for young ladies and the hope they’d reach their full potential. Our President also shares our love of young, nubile girls.” The letter makes another lewd reference to Trump’s treatment of women.
“Life is unfair,” the letter reads.
Q: is “I have taken the ‘short route’ home” some sort of euphemism saying he was killing himself?
Merde-a-Lardo itself was subpoena’ed:
Prosecutors subpoenaed Mar-a-Lago for employment records in Maxwell case
The Mar-a-Lago club was subpoenaed to produce documents in the case of United States v. Ghislaine Maxwell on Nov. 29, 2021, according to a copy of the subpoena included in the new files.
The subpoena demanded “Any and all employment records relating to [redacted].”
It is not clear who appeared on the club’s behalf.
Maxwell, a longtime associate of Epstein, was convicted of sex trafficking in 2021 and is serving a 20-year prison sentence.
“The FBI received a tip in October 2020 that appears to be from an unidentified female who said she had information about a ‘Jeffrey Epstein party’ in 2000. The person’s information is redacted in the FBI’s summary of the tip, which is included in the new files.”
“The woman alleged that someone named Ghislaine Lisa Villeneuve brought her to the party. Later, someone said that Donald Trump had invited everyone to Mar-A-Lago, according to the tipster.”
And here’s the document itself embedded as an image in this tweet.
Meanwhile, Morning Joe is carrying water for his old pal:
Scarborough: “Trump is not on Epstein’s list. There’s nothing in there really damning about Trump or Bill Clinton. So one of the great mysteries is not what Trump’s hiding, it’s why if he’s not in the files – which all the reporting says he’s not – why is he so obsessed on blocking access to them?”
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar.com) December 22, 2025 at 7:21 AM
Where’s Anonymous When You Need Them?
Sunday Tiedrich
We the People are being shit on again.
it was bad enough when Friday’s deadline came and went without Donny Convict’s corrupt Department of Justice releasing the full Epstein Files, as they were required to by law.
it was bad enough when the DOJ served us a slice of Go Fuck Yourself Pie by releasing less than one percent of the documents in their possession.
it was bad enough when hundreds upon hundreds of the documents they didrelease were completely blacked out and unreadable.
it was bad enough when it became obvious that what was released had been carefully curated to ensure there were almost zero references to Dear Leader.
but things just got a whole lot worse — because these lawless fucks are now memory-holing the shit they did release.
NEW YORK (AP) — At least 16 files disappeared from the Justice Department’s public webpage for documents related to Jeffrey Epstein — including a photograph showing President Donald Trump — less than a day after they were posted, with no explanation from the government and no notice to the public.
stuff that was already on line is now disappearing — ‘with no explanation’ — because fuck you, that’s why. what part of ‘memory hole’ do you need explained to you?
fortunately for us, the internet never forgets — so we can give you at least one explanation:
someone done fucked up and accidentally posted a photo of Dear Leader posing with bikini-clad teenagers.
here’s ‘photo 468’ from the original collection that was posted on Friday.
let’s zoom in on the bottom left of that pic.
oh my. some bleary-eyed FBI Special Agent who’d spent a month working 20-hour days, scouring every photo for appearances of Dear Leader, missed this one.
photo 468 is now gone. if you click on the directory listing for it, you get an error message.
hey, it’s pretty weird how Jeffrey Epstein kept photos of Donny with teenage girls in his desk drawer, isn’t it? you don’t suppose Donny’s dead pedo bestie was planning on using that shit as kompromat, do you?
all these people fucking suck.
here’s another photo that got scrubbed from the DOJ web site.
why? this photo has been in the public domain for years. we’ve all seen it a hundred times.
meanwhile, Donny’s minions are doing their best to smear Bill Clinton as the real criminal in the Epstein Saga. they front-loaded the first batch of the Dead Pedo Bestie Files with as many photos of Bill as they could.
here’s White House Deputy Press Secretary Abigail Johnson, gleefully implying that Clinton and Michael Jackson were cavorting with ‘victims and/or minors.’
“Per the Epstein Files Transparency Act, DOJ was specifically instructed only to redact the faces of victims and/or minors. Here is a picture of Bill Clinton with his arm around Michael Jackson, and redacted individuals.”
for fuck’s sake, this photo doesn’t even have anything to do with Jeffrey Epstein. it’s Clinton with Michael Jackson and his children, and Diana Ross and her son, taken at a fundraiser in DC in 2003.
look, if Bill Clinton was doing sick shit with minors, nail his ass to the wall. chuck him the fuck into prison and throw away the key. I don’t think you’ll find one person on the left who would say anything different. but don’t you dare gun up fake evidence.
that’s the difference between us and them. we want justice, no matter where the chips fall. they want Dear Leader protected at all costs.
tell me, when Donny sent that birthday card to his dead pedo bestie with the poem about the ‘wonderful secrets they shared,’ do you think this is what he was talking about?
here’s another question: do words even have meanings any more? I ask, because look at the twaddle Pam Bondi posted to Elon’s Nazi Bar. she’s proud of her fuckery. she’s calling the release of heavily-redacted documents ‘transparency.’
President Trump is leading the most transparent administration in American history.
By moving to unseal these documents, we hope to give the American people more answers about that fateful day in Butler, Pennsylvania. https://t.co/v7iH9sfpiW
— Attorney General Pamela Bondi (@AGPamBondi) December 20, 2025
cool story, Pam. let’s fact-check your claim of ‘transparency.’
congratulations are in order — because Pam’s outdone George Orwell.
to ‘war is peace,’ ‘ignorance is strength,’ and ‘freedom is slavery,’ we can now add ‘censorship is transparency.’
look at what else these DOJ fucksticks did: they forced Jake Tapper to commit a journalism. he hates it when he has to do that shit.
come on, people. Jake doesn’t want to be scrolling though his phone, showing you redacted files. he’s got sixteen more books to write about how Joe Biden is icky and old and smells bad and probably doesn’t even realize that he’s already dead.
“talk about blacking out, I don’t know if we can get a close-up of my phone. this is one of the documents that the Justice Department released. it’s a hundred pages. this is what it looks like. it’s all black. it’s just one hundred pages of redaction. that’s the ‘transparency’ we’re getting here.”
let’s gif that shit for posterity’s sake.
Pam Bondi’s DOJ was required by law — one that Dear Leader signed — to release everything by December 19. there were no if, and, or buts. the law didn’t say if it was too hard to get the job done in time — let’s say because there were so many references to Donny that had to be scrubbed — they get a mulligan.
they’re not supposed to crap out some unreadable tiny fraction of the files and pinky-swear to release the rest of it any day now.
oh, look at me — flapping my futile gums about what these shitstains aren’tsupposed to do.
they’re not supposed to slap Dear Leader’s name on the Kennedy Center. they’re not supposed to detain US citizens for the crime of having the wrong color skin. they’re not supposed to have the military occupy American cities. and they’re sure as fuck not supposed to murder Venezuelan sailors for the high crime of being in a boat.
unfortunately, legal accountability for suppressing the Dead Pedo Bestie Files is going to be hard to come by. sure, Congress could submit a criminal referral for obstruction of justice — but do you know who any such referral would be sent to? Pam Bondi. good luck with that.
but here’s one workable option that’s already on the table: impeach the living shit out of Bondi.
“DEVELOPING: Reps. Ro Khanna and Thomas Massie say they’re drafting articles of impeachment against AG Pam Bondi over the illegal handling of the Epstein files. This just escalated fast. Accountability is coming.”
sounds like a plan.
hey Pam, you want to avoid that? fine, here’s all you have to do: release the full, unedited Epstein Files, you fucking liar.
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
The Week In Stupid
monday: ’tis the season to be batshit
Christmas is mere days away, so let’s take a peek into the MAGAsphere and see how they’ve been decking their halls.
now there’s a role model.
‘look darlings, it’s Dear Leader’s mug shot.’
what’s a mug shot, mommy?
‘it’s the photo they took of Dear Leader the day he was arrested in Fulton County, Georgia, for election fraud.’
what’s election fraud, mommy?
MAGA, I beg of you — please don’t do this to your children. they’re young and innocent. don’t fill their heads with your psychotic hero worship. give them the space to grow up and make their own mistakes. they don’t need to repeat yours. trust me, it will be fewer hours spent in therapy when they’re adults.
hey, you know who else headed up a cult that encouraged its children to worship in front of loyalty shrines of their supreme leader? of course you do.
tuesday: don we now our what kind of apparel
perhaps MAGA’s spiritual leaders have a better handle on the true holiday spirit. let’s check in with Pastor Hank Kunneman and see how he’s been ’tis-the-seasoning.
“how ’bout when he told the disciples and said ‘hey, go tell Herod, the fox.’ now that word, ‘fox,’ was not ‘oh, go tell that sly guy,’ no, the literal translation of ‘sly fox’ is basically someone who is bisexual. I’ve heard some people use the word faggot — that it literally meant to call out Herod’s sexual immorality.”
oh lovely, Pastor Hank has conjured up Homophobic Slur Jesus — the one who filled his supplicants’ ears with hateful crap like ‘don’t love thy neighbor, that shit’s gay as fuck.’
now, I freely admit that I’m no religious scholar. I don’t know dick about if Herod had a hankering for dicks. maybe Pastor Hank knows something I don’t. so I googled it, just to make sure — because I’m a responsible journalist and everything.
“how ’bout when he told the disciples and said ‘hey, go tell Herod, the fox.’ now that word, ‘fox,’ was not ‘oh, go tell that sly guy,’ no, the literal translation of ‘sly fox’ is basically someone who is bisexual. I’ve heard some people use the word faggot — that it literally meant to call out Herod’s sexual immorality.”
oh lovely, Pastor Hank has conjured up Homophobic Slur Jesus — the one who filled his supplicants’ ears with hateful crap like ‘don’t love thy neighbor, that shit’s gay as fuck.’
now, I freely admit that I’m no religious scholar. I don’t know dick about if Herod had a hankering for dicks. maybe Pastor Hank knows something I don’t. so I googled it, just to make sure — because I’m a responsible journalist and everything.
wednesday: deck the halls with boughs of wait a minute
fuck these young upstarts like Pastor Hank. they’re too steeped in MAGA to be of any use to anyone. let’s go old-school, and see what Franklin Graham’s been up to.
here’s the Frankster, giving a pep talk at the Department of War (his words, not mine).
“but did you know that God also hates? do you know that God also is a God of war? many people don’t want to think about that.”
oh for fuck’s sake, it’s Christmas time. what kind of ’tis-the-seasonmessaging is that?
come on bro, that’s the old testament god, the one who hates. yeah, he’s a bit of a dick, always raining down plagues and smiting the shit out of his enemies and whatnot.
why is Franklin Graham harshing our mellow with that shit? that’s not what Christmas is all about. bro, we’re doing Jesus this month. you know, the new testament guy. the ‘prince of peace’ who threw all that hate stuff out the window. the feed-the-poor-and-help-the-needy homey. the love-thy-neighbordude. get with the program already, Frank.
I’m a Jew, dammit. how did it become my job to explain to these shitkazoos how Christianity works? this is way beyond my pay-grade.
oh, and I’ve got a news flash for Reverend Graham — it’s not the Department of War. it’s the Department of Flipping a Skateboard Into Your Own Nuts.
thursday: troll the ancient yule-tide excuse me now?
this is getting frustrating. doesn’t anyone in the MAGAverse understand the true meaning of Christmas?
oh wait — here’s the Department of Homeland security with a surprisingly appropriate and heartfelt message: ‘go home for the holidays.’
awwww, isn’t that sweet? how nice that— [taps earpiece] hang on, I’m being told that if you click the link in that tweet, it takes you to a page for ‘self-deporting.’
fuck me, are you serious with this shit?
can’t you racists give your hateful bullshit a rest for one week? is that really too much to ask?
come on, it’s Christmas. the holiday celebrating the birth of Jesus, the immigrant with the Spanish name who, if he left the door open and you said to him, ‘hey Jesus, were you born in a barn?’ he would literally answer yes.
no one encouraged Joseph and Mary to click the link to self-deport. if they did, we wouldn’t even have a fucking holiday.
look at me. once again, it’s the Jew who has to explain Christmas. is the whole world on crazy pills?
but they pinky-swore that they would make some Pedo Files available by the end of the day.
the fucking idiot then went ahead and had his accursed name added to the Kennedy Center building — despite being prohibited by law from doing so.
and because apparently no one in the White House understands how grammar works, the name of the building is now The Donald J. Trump And The John F. Kennedy Memorial Center For The Performing Arts.
my god, they’re all just as fucking idiotic as the fucking idiot.
you know who else appropriated a beloved cultural institution and made it a monument to his own vanity, don’t you? of course you do.
oh look! the DOJ actually released a handful of Dead Pedo Bestie files — which was awesome, except for the part where hundreds upon hundreds of pages were completely redacted.
thank you so much, DOJ!
by the way, while every other news outlet was poring over the Dead Pedo Bestie Files, here’s what Fox News was covering.
the fucking idiot then boarded Idiot Force One to spend Christmas Week at his vermin-infested Florida golf model.
on the way down to Motel-a-Lago, he stopped in off in North Carolina to give a very dignified and presidential speech, during which he waxed romantic about his Slovenian rent-a-wife’s panties.
and not one worthless scribbler of the corporate-controlled media stood up to ask ‘what the fuck is wrong with you?’
how fucking idiotic is that?
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
And Another Week Draws To A Close
“I mean, it’s one banana, Michael. what could it cost? ten dollars?”
— Lucille Bluth, Arrested Development
never underestimate the ability of Donny Convict’s toadies to be both evil and buffoonish at the same time.
yesterday, the crackpots in charge of healthcare — Bobby Brainworms and the Shitblizzard of Oz — announced that they were banning gender-affirming care for minors. that’s the evil part.
now get ready for the clownfuckery. here’s Oz, uttering a sentence you probably never thought you’d hear during an official government press event.
“shockingly, a phalloplasty, the creation of a penis, costs on average in America, according to this data, high quality, $150,000 per child. these prices have continued to increase with increasing manufactured demand … you add testicles, that’s extra.”
apparently, the price of peeners is on the rise. who even knew penis inflationwas a thing? and not the fun kind of penis inflation. is this something we can blame on Sleepy Joe Biden?
a hundred and fifty grand for a weenus — a high-quality weenus, at that. because who wants a low-quality unit? spare no expense, I say! who wants people going ‘what the fuck is that’ every time you drop trou?
but come on — let’s get real. who’s paying retail for penises?
look, everyone knows someone. if you really need a trouser hog that bad, there’s always a guy who can hook you up.
even Marjorie Three Toes Greene knows where to find a dick.
and don’t get me started on Handy Oakley.
this pathological obsession Republicans have about what inside everyone’s underwear is downright creepy.
so now they’re meddling with gender-affirming care. why? because fuck you, that’s why. because they can. because they’re terrified of the very idea of anyone who isn’t straight, white and cis.
none of these hatemongers have the slightest idea what they’re talking about. listen to Whalehead McChainaw, droning on about shit that’s way beyond his ability to comprehend.
“So-called gender affirming care has inflicted lasting physical and psychological damage on vulnerable young people,” Kennedy said. “This is not medicine. It is malpractice.”
you’ll be shocked to learn that actual medical professionals were all ‘shut your ignorant mouth, Bobby.’
The American Academy of Pediatrics pushed back strongly against HHS’s actions.
“These policies and proposals misconstrue the current medical consensus and fail to reflect the realities of pediatric care and the needs of children and families,” said AAP President Dr. Susan J. Kressly.
over to you, Charlotte Clymer, to explain what’s really going on here.
“The science behind gender-affirming care has been endorsed by every major medical organization. This isn’t about science or medicine. It’s about the discomfort many non-trans people feel over the *existence* of trans people.”
exactly. I’m so tired of being ruled over by a fucktangle of bigoted know-nothings, inflicting their own childish insecurities on the rest of us.
why is anyone even listening to nut-jobs like Brainworms and Oz? why are they using the price of something as an excuse to set policy? they’re out of touch. they’re morbidly wealthy shitwits who have no idea what anythingshould cost.
gender-affirming care is not the healthcare issue our government needs to be focusing on right now. here’s a real problem that’s in dire need of solving:
there’s a measles epidemic in this country right now. measles, for fuck’s sake. an easily-preventable disease which we had already eradicated in America.
thanks in no small part to Bobby Brainworms’ own crackpot notions about vaccines, we now have almost 2,000 actives cases of the measles in the US right now. that’s up from nearly zero just a few years ago — and the number is increasing every day.
isn’t doing something about that more important than fixating over what’s going on inside some teenager’s underwear?
please leave these people alone. just let them be who they want to be.
let me highlight just how much we’re being governed by crackpots. here’s a fun fact about Dr. Oz. did you know that he considers himself a bit of a connoisseur when it comes to guzzling piss?
Dr. Mehmet Oz once claimed that medical schools force prospective doctors to drink human urine as part of their training. In an old interview with late-night host Jimmy Kimmel that resurfaced over the weekend, the GOP’s Senate nominee in Pennsylvania elaborated on a seemingly lifelong personal fascination with all things pee.
Oz elaborated in his interview with Kimmel, saying that urine can be helpful to diagnose various illnesses and conditions. “A diabetic’s [urine] tastes like wine, cherry wine,” Oz told a bewildered Kimmel.
fact check: what the fuck is Oz talking about?
No medical school requires students to taste urine, unlike what Dr. Oz may have said previously.
— Zachary Rubin, MD (@rubin_allergy) October 16, 2022
yet Oz is out here tossing back tankards of fresh bladder juice like it’s going out of style, and acting as if it were perfectly normal.
speaking of dumbfucks who have no idea what they’re doing when it comes to healthcare policy, look at what our Crackpot-in-Chief is up to.
reporter: “more than 20 million Americans are now bracing for their premiums to skyrocket.”
Donny: “they will skyrocket because it was never any good.”
healthcare is a mess in this country because Donny doesn’t actually want to fix anything. he loves it when shit goes sideways. he’s a chaos-junkie who gets off on breaking everything, and then blaming it on someone else.
fixing shit is hard. bread-and-circuses dumbfuckery is easy — and Donny’s come up with a perfectly useless spectacle that he hopes will distact us all from how fucked up everything is.
“in the fall we will host the first ever Patriot Games, an unprecedented four-day athletic event featuring the greatest high school athletes — one young man and one young woman from each state and territory.”
now hold on there just one goddamned minute.
if the idea of ‘American teenagers from each state competing against each other for the amusement of a government of obscenely wealthy autocrats who rule over a nation of poverty-stricken peons’ sounds familiar to you, that’s because it’s the premise of the dystopian novel (and movie) The Hunger Games.
except in The Hunger Games, the teenagers battle each other to the death.
oh shit, I probably shouldn’t even say that out loud. let’s not give Dear Leader any ideas.
lastly, happy Dead Pedo Bestie Files Release Day to all who observe.
this is going to be my closing message for the foreseeable future:
practice self-care. do what you need to do to keep sane. if that means you need to disengage with my daily posts for a while, I get it. this community of ours will still be here when you return.
to all the people who have signed on in the days since the election, welcome aboard. settle in as we all try to deal with the shitfuckery that’s ahead of us.
we are all in this together, and we are all here for each other.
Valid Question
Stay Subversive
[Source]
A Consummation Devoutly To Be Wished
From Greg Fallis:
I’m hesitant to write this. Well, that’s not entirely true. I’m happy to write it. I’m hesitant to hope it might be true. I’ve hoped this hope so many times in the past, and each time that hope has been soundly kicked squarely in the yorbels. But I dunno…this time…maybe? So what the hell, I’m going to write it.
We may actually be seeing the beginning of the end of Comrade President Donald J. Trump.
Why do I think that? Epstein.
Let’s face it, MAGA has repeatedly demonstrated that they’ll forgive Trump for anything. The open corruption, the galactic level hypocrisy, the gobsmacking incompetence, the extravagant lies, the destruction of the East Wing of the White House, the inability to maintain a coherent thought for any length of time, the complete and utter lack of loyalty to his subordinate, the destruction of a health care system they rely on, the destruction of civil liberties. MAGA has always found ways to overlook, justify, or even celebrate that shit.
And to be honest, a sizable chunk of MAGA will forgive Trump for boinking teenaged girls. They may claim to be disappointed that he boinked teenaged girls while he was married, but they’ll forgive him for it. Some will even applaud him for it.
But Epstein?
Epstein is different. Epstein exists outside the ‘boys will be boys’ framework. Epstein has become shorthand for ‘child sex trafficking.’ And child sex trafficking has been a mainstay of right-wing conspiracy theories for a long, long time. These people spend a LOT of time thinking about forced sex with young girls. If you recall, the QAnon movement was solidly locked into the notion that powerful (mostly Democratic) politicians and Hollywood elites (exclusively Democratic) had formed a cabal of Satanic/cannibalistic pedophiles who kidnapped, imprisoned, raped, and murdered children for their adrenochrome.
The loopy passion of QAnon was matched by—and eventually merged with—the loopy passion of MAGA. The membrane between QAnon and MAGA became even more porous and the loopiness escalated when Epstein died while in Federal custody. There was a feeding frenzy of conspiracy theories detailing how and by whom Epstein was murdered. Q/MAGA was energized during the 2024 election by Trump’s promise to release all the Epstein files if he was re-elected.
And hey, bingo…he was. In February, Attorney General Pam Bondi told reporters the Epstein client list “is on my desk right now for review.” Q/MAGA got excited. The truth was going to come out. Any day now. Really. Get ready. It was coming. Finally we’d know the truth. Just as soon as Bondi finished reviewing all the files. The Epstein client list would be made public and the elites would be held accountable for their horrific crimes. Q/MAGA could hardly contain itself. The anticipation was intense.
Then, on a busy Friday over the 4th of July holiday weekend, Bondi quietly announced that the Epstein client list…well, it didn’t exist. Sorry. Oh, and Epstein wasn’t murdered; he just killed himself. Case closed. Nothing to see here. What’s on Netflix this week?
Q/MAGA was…stunned. Then angry. Righteously angry. Now they feel betrayed. Not just by Bondi’s bait-and-switch, but by the possibility—wait, the probability—the OMFG certainty that Trump, his ownself, was on the list. Not just ON the list, but very likely FEATURED throughout the Epstein files. All of that loopy passion began to turn against Trump…and that’s a LOT of loopy passion.
I wrote about this back in July. In response to a question, I said this:
I don’t for a moment believe this will take Trump down. But I DO think it will weaken him. And I’m good with that. I don’t think there’s any single issue or scandal that can pull him down, but I think every issue that causes him to bleed a bit should be amplified. Death by a thousand cuts…that works for me.
I’m starting to change my mind on this. I’m starting to believe the sheer depth and scope of all that Epstein-inspired loopy passion could take Trump down. Again, I’m hesitant to hope for it, because there’s been a Friday the 13th quality to Trump; he doesn’t stay dead.
But maybe this time? Maybe dead Epstein will take Trump down? There would certainly be a sort of poetic justice to that. Maybe this could actually put an end to our national heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks that Trump has inflicted upon us.
‘Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.
UPDATE: Today Trump announced that he’s asking the Department of Justice to investigate Democrats linked to Epstein. Just Democrats, apparently. The most obvious reason is to draw attention away from himself. A less obvious reason: by getting the DOJ to investigate Democrats, the DOJ can then refuse to release the Epstein files because of an “ongoing investigation.”
EDITORIAL NOTE: Seriously, we need to burn the patriarchy to the ground. Just about everything that’s fucked up in the world has its roots in patriarchy. Or capitalism. Much the same thing, really. Burn patriarchy and capitalism will also go up in smoke. Burn it.

















































































































