Category: Television

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To the Writers of Supernatural…

Be aware that Outraged Fanboys + Social Media = Payback is a bitch.

Hoping to just make the whole thing just go away, you've succeeded in making your condemned love between Cas and Dean Winchester into the one thing the entire series will be remembered for and meme'd for the ages.







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Gratuitous Ricky Whittle

And speaking of Mr. Whittle, the third season of American Gods has recaptured a lot of the magic that was lost in Season 2. I almost didn't even bother watching this year, but I've been pleasantly surprised. The story is still all over the place and I miss several of the characters that are just gone, but my (pardon the pun) gods, the cinematography…

Truly magical.

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I think I prefer the beard-in-progress Castiel. But I'd pay to watch Cas and Dean give each other beard burn just with their 3-day scruff…

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What The Hell Was THAT?

I mean seriously.

Ben and I have been fans of Sabrina since its inception in 2018. It was semi-creepy mindless fun, and it's no wonder it was continually renewed.

But something went seriously awry this year, and most specifically in the final few episodes of what is supposedly the series entire run. It's as if everyone got notice that it wasn't being renewed and decided to somehow wrap everything up in the most ridiculous ways possible. It felt like the writers just threw everything into a Cuisinart and pushed blend. What came out was a wholly unsatisfying serving of goop that made me understand why people were complaining so loudly online (we were several weeks behind in our viewing).

I'm sad to see the show end, and even moreso that they chose to go out in this fashion. I won't go into specifics (you can find plenty of that online if you're so inclined), but I'm just going to throw up my hands and walk away, disappointed that what was such a fun escape imploded so badly.

Next up: Supernatural. (Yes, we finally made it through the entire series.)

SPOILER ALERT: I felt much the same about the way the writers chose to end Supernatural as well.

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After Slogging Through Too Many Seasons of Supernatural and Criminal Minds These Past Few Months……

I have issues.

  • WHY DO THEY ALWAYS SLICE THEIR PALM TO GET BLOOD? Do you know how many nerve endings are in your hand?!?! Why don't they ever cut the back of their arm or their leg or something OMFG!
  • WHILE WE'RE AT IT, why do people try to cross those skinny bridges over lava/chasms/whatever by walking upright. IT'S CALLED CENTER OF GRAVITY FOR A REASON. Get on your hands and knees and crawl across that thing. HUG IT. SCOOT YOUR BUTT ACROSS. "But i look stupid!" LALALALA. But we'll avoid that stupidly dramatic moment when you almost fall over and die because your damn fucking self wanted to look COOL
  • STOP YANKING IV LINES OUT OF YOUR ARMS THE MINUTE YOU WAKE UP IN THE HOSPITAL! Do you want to fucking bleed to death?!
  • That is a broadsword, why are you fencing with it?
  • There is a freaking door right there. Stop smashing through windows, damn it!
  • Yes, Mr. Action Hero, I am aware that running dramatically from the baddies at breakneck speed is important, but know what else is important? NOT GETTING SHOT. RUN IN A FUCKING ZIGZAG PATTERN ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT THE MOOKS WERE NOT COACHED IN MARKSMANSHIP BY THE IMPERIAL STORMTROOPERS.
  • And oh hey, you there…sneaky hero-type breaking into any place for any reason? WEAR SOME FUCKING GLOVES. They're called fingerprints, dumbass. You have them and you're putting them all over the fucking place.
  • If something really fucking huge is falling on you, don't FUCKING RUN ALONG THE LENGTH OF THE THING! JUST TAKE LIKE TWO FUCKING STEPS TO THE SIDE, OR BETTER YET, RUN 90 DEGREES TO THE THING!
  • And for God's sake, PUT PRESSURE ON THAT WOUND. DON'T JUST SIT THERE AND IT BLEED OUT. I'm talking to you, TV cops.
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The Sam & Dean Comedy Hour

That's what Ben and I are starting to call it as we continue to slog our way through the fifteen (sixteen? seven hundred?) seasons of Supernatural. We just started season six, and I've got only one thing to ask:

How does anyone find the will to go on from one episode to the next without putting a boot through their television or a bullet in their head?

So much shark jumping.

So many plot holes you can drive a fleet of trucks through.

So many still-unresolved Daddy Issues.  Seriously guys…see a shrink for chrissake!

And while you're there you might want to discuss the whole "wincest" vibe that's going on between you in almost every episode. I just want to yell, "Would you two just FUCK and get it over with already?! Jesus!"

Or is all this supposed to be part of the show's charm?