(I’ve been wondering when one of these would show up in my email!)

Hello,

You are in big trouble. However, don’t panic right away. Listen to me first, because  there is always a way out.

You are now on the radar of an international group of hackers,
and such things never end well for anyone. I’m sure you’ve heard of Anonymous. Well, compared to us, they are a bunch of schoolboys. We are a worldwide network of several thousand professionals, each with their own role.

Someone hacks corporate and government networks, someone
cooperates with intelligence agencies on the most delicate tasks,
and someone (including me) deals with people like you to maintain the infrastructure of our group. “What kind of people like me?” – that is the question you are probably asking yourself now.

The answer is simple: people who like to watch highly controversial and, shall we say,unconventional pornography on the internet that most normal people would consider perverted. But not you!

In order to leave you without any doubts, I’ll explain how I found it out. Two months ago, my colleagues and I installed spyware software on your computer and then gained access to all of your devices, including your phone. It was easy – one of those many pop-ups on porn sites was our work.

I think you already understand that we would not write to an ordinary man who watches “vanilla” and even hardcore porn – there is nothing special about that. But the things you’re watching are beyond good and evil. So after accessing your phone and computer cameras, we recorded you masturbating to extremely controversial videos. There is a close-up footage of you and a little square on the right with the videos you’re pleasing yourself. However, as I said earlier, there is always a way out, because even the most degraded sinner deserves leniency. You are lucky today because I am not a sadist who enjoys other people’s suffering. Only money matters to me.

Here is your salvation: you must transfer $1300 in Bitcoin to this BTC cryptocurrency wallet: bc1qyzt9nrwtas821237se4nfjq8jv

You have exactly 48 hours to make the payment, so think less, and  do more. As soon as I receive confirmation of the transaction, I will  delete all compromising content and permanently disable our computer worm. Believe me, I always abide by gentleman’s agreements. Even with people who are hardly gentlemen. Because it’s nothing personal, just business.

If I do not receive a payment, I will send all videos of you to every person in your contact list, messengers and email. Relatives, loved ones, colleagues, friends-everyone you’ve ever been in contact with will receive them. You understand perfectly well that you will never be able to wash this stain on your reputation. Everyone will remember you as sick as fuck. Your life will be completely ruined, and, most likely, only a tightened noose around your neck will be able to save the day.

If you haven’t dealt with crypto before, I suppose it won’t be difficult for you to figure it all out. Simply type in the “crypto exchange” into the search bar and pay with a credit card. Besides, based on your browser history, you are a savvy user. When you want to, you can dig into the darkest depths of the Internet, so I’m sure you will be able to find out what is what.

Here is what my colleagues and I should warn you against: …Do not reply to this email. Do you really think we are so stupid to be tracked by an email address? This is a temporary disposable email. As soon as I clicked “Send”, it was gone for good. …Forget about law-enforcement authorities. As soon as I see that you are trying to contact them, the compromising material will be published. Remember, I have access to all your devices, and I can even track your movements. …Do not reset your devices to factory settings and do not try to get rid of your devices. It won’t help in any way. Look above – my All-seeing eye is watching all your actions. It is easy to hunt you down.

I am sorry that we met in such circumstances. Probably, everything could be different if you had been more careful about what you are doing on the Internet. Watch yourself from now on, because even such things that you previously considered insignificant can destroy your life in the future like a butterfly effect. I hope this is goodbye forever. However, it depends on you.

There are so many things I’d love to respond with, but I won’t because I don’t need to confirm that these assholes have a working email address. But seriously…my response? Gurl, have you seen my blog?

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