Here's some useful shit you need to know before your epic journey on November 6th…
- Who the fuck do I contact if dickshits try to fuck with my voting? Call one of these toll-free hotlines, these badass motherfuckers know their shit and are wise in the ways of showing election day dickshits what's fuckin' what:
1-866-MYVOTE1 (866-698-6831)
1-866-OUR-VOTE (866-687-8683)
1-888-VE-Y-VOTA (en Español)
- Can I get in on that early/absentee voting shit? Fuckin' how? (Second to fucking last on the menu.)
- Sandy just fucked my shit right up, how the dick am I supposed to vote? (Mainly NYC info)
- When the fuck do I have to get my ass in line by?
- The League of Women Voters are rifuckulously on top of shit, and they've got your back as a motherfucking voter. Have more questions, such as whether or not you get time off to vote? The step on over to their nuts-blastingly awesome search tool that lets you look shit up by state and topic.
This list is fucking incomplete—so if you have anything important, how about adding that shit? People out there could fucking use it, you know.
Unfuck your voting!