Why?

Over the years I’ve gotten quite a few inquiries from readers asking, “Why all the men smoking? Why are you posting all these photos of otherwise good-looking young men, sullied with cigarettes dangling from their lips?”

A valid question.

I don’t smoke. I never have. Neither has Ben, or for that matter any of my friends—with one exception. Both my parents smoked when I was growing up (it was the 60s after all), but I heartily sung their praise when they quit in my teens.

I think the reason I never started was out of spite more than anything else. Even when I was in first or second grade I was giving Mom a hard time about her habit. One day she quipped, “One day you’ll smoke too,” and I responded, “I will NOT!” and stuck to my guns all these years.

When I first came out, I was smoking neutral. I’d hook up—as infrequent as those encounters were—with smokers and non-smokers alike. The only thing I really hated about smoking in general was coming home after a night at the club (it was the late 70s after all) reeking of the smell. In fact, often the first thing I’d do upon arriving home in the wee hours of the morning would be to strip down, throw my clothes in the washer, and shower before going to bed.

But sometime in the 80s—and definitely after I moved to San Francisco—my neutrality changed to a staunch anti-smoking stance. Seeing a cigarette dangling from a guy’s lips was an immediate turn-off and killed any further interest.

Something changed again for me in the 90s. Suddenly that same dangling cigarette became very sexy—if only visually. I still couldn’t stand the smell, and my boss—an older guy who smoked like a chimney in the office until we all demanded he step outside—had breath that could knock a person dead at ten paces.

But there was still something about the look. I know the habit will unnaturally age all these beautiful young men and they’ll look like crap by the time they’re my age (if they even live that long), but in my eyes they’re damn sexy now.

The irony of that video is not lost on me…