WARNING: Rant ahead. You may just want to move on.
Someone I didn't know that well on Facebook recently left two comments (as if one wasn't enough to get his point across) that said, "All you do is post angry shit!"
After de-friending him, I posted something on my wall to the effect, "If you're not angry, you're not paying attention to what's going on in the world." But his observation did get me to thinking, and I've since dialed back my postings on Facebook.
This blog, however, is mine, and if I want to bitch and rant and howl at the moon, I will. If you don't like it, you're welcome to stop reading.
Anyhow…
It's been nearly eleven months since Ben and I arrived in Denver, and I've done my best to adjust to it, but I fuckin' hate this place. I'll muddle through for as long as necessary for Ben's sake, but if we had to pack and leave tomorrow, no tears would be shed. There is not one thing about Denver or Colorado that I would miss.
Metaphysically speaking, my energy vibration and Denver's are most definitely out of sync. You know how you sometimes go places and they just don't feel right? That's me and Denver. I never thought I'd hear myself say it, but I'm really starting to miss Arizona.
I miss being near my family, as dysfunctional as it may be. At this point I even miss seeing Ben's mom. And while lord knows I constantly bitched about it in this blog, I miss my old job. Yeah, I hated the on-call duty and the resounding level of stupidity displayed by the user base, but on the whole I liked the people I worked with in my department; not enough to socialize after hours (it's been a long time since I shared that kind of camaraderie), but I didn't mind spending 8 hours a day with them. And the money was good.
And let's face it: there had to have been something going for it to have kept me there for seven years.
I miss my doctor. A couple years ago I finally found a doctor in Phoenix whom I trusted and admired as much as my old MD in San Francisco, and now that's gone. (I went to a recommended physician here two months ago and hated the guy so much I haven't been back, not even to get the results of the $1200 (!!!) worth of "routine" blood tests they ran.)
The weather in Denver is admittedly beautiful in the summer. Suffering through months of 110 degree temps in Phoenix had become a real drag and our arrival here was a welcome relief. But winter? Now I understand why, after my folks divorced in the 80s and Mom moved back to Wisconsin, she was back in Arizona a year later.
We're paying more than twice what we were in Phoenix for an apartment with the same amenities that is about 100 square feet smaller.
While the streets in Phoenix were bad, in Denver they're horrible. I'm convinced the city and the alignment/repair shops are in collusion to keep them this way. It's the only explanation for the city being pockmarked with 6" deep, unavoidable potholes everywhere.
It's impossible to keep the car looking good more than three or four days in a row. Admittedly minor, I know, but still annoying for someone who likes his car clean.
And don't get me started on Denver drivers. I thought they were bad in Phoenix. Here they are insane.
While I'm making $10K a year less than I was in Phoenix for doing more, work was fine until my boss gave notice a month ago, taking his extensive knowledge and skill set with him. Yesterday the COO asked me if I'd help out the developers (something he used to do) if they're caught in a pinch. I tried to explain to her that I do not possess any development skills, and it would be a waste of everyone's time in that situation. It fell on deaf ears.
I'm a desktop tech, not a developer. I have no desire to be a developer. So honey, if you run into a pinch in an emergency, it's not my issue that you don't have enough staff to cover. You brought me on board for the skill set I possessed; not for one you'd hope I'd learn down the road. HIRE A FUCKING TEMP WHO KNOWS THAT SHIT, YOU CHEAP BASTARDS.
And then the bitch has the nerve last night to email me asking one of the developers and I to order food for the boss's farewell potluck tomorrow. "I'll split the cost with you."
I shot an email back to her this morning that said, "I just registered my car and paid rent. I have no extra money. I'll bring some sort of side dish."
I fuckin' hate this place.
My description of America consists of The East, The West, and the Rest!
And now you have at least a taste of how I came to that conclusion.
And your pilgrims comment is spot on in my mind.
As to the Emerald City, I lived there for 2 winters and one summer (July) and the cloud cover and drizzle will dampen your spirits more than you want to know. Having spent as much time in Phoenix as you did, you got used to bright skies, and soggy city has relatively few of them.
But Mike and I will welcome you two if you ever change your mind about Southern California.
Pretty much what Sean said.
Do you have a location you would like to go next?
I'm sorry you don't like Denver. There is a spiritual energy in the Southwest that exists nowhere else that I have been. I have been missing that feeling for years. While Lake Superior is very beautiful, its just not the same. And, Winter Sucks!!!!! Rant on, I enjoy reading your posts. Life seems to be full of "learning experiences" that sometimes are not what I want to learn. Hang in there!
Since my memories of the initial move to San Francisco are hazy, I asked Bernie a while back if he remembered me hating SF when we first moved there and he replied, "Where do you want me to start?"
I know I had some transition problems to the point that one of the affirmations I still had pasted to the refrigerator a full year after moving there was "San Francisco is my home. I love the City and the City loves me back." But I don't remember outright hating the place until much, much later. Of course, we all tend to only remember the good times and not the bad, so it's quite possible that I did.
Love your rants and I'm sorry that life is sucking in The Mile High City.
Dear Dr. Dick, aka R Wagner, if they move anywhere we want them here in LA LA land. BUT, the 'EMERALD' city is nice.
That wouldn't change the fact that I'm away from my family and doctor. Plus, I've had enough of earthquake country.
I know! Why not consider a move to The Emerald City? I think you'd like it here.
Ditto what Sean typed.
Rants are some of your best posts and you always have breathers mixed in. Also, you may own this site but FB is no less yours. If people don't like what you have to say then they should stop reading, or you can block them. Just to be safe, maybe you should shore up your soapbox until Ben is finished in CO.
Well I truly believe that anywhere west of the rockies is a good place to be. I feel your pain. I have lived in Los Angeles for 40yrs. I have briefly lived in other places like San Francisco and Phoenix. I even lived in Corpus Christy in 1983 for two months. When you love a place very very much it's hard to even try to like anywhere else. OH and I love it when you bitch about things. It's not the only thing you do. You cover just about everything, including beefcake.
I've long believed that if the Pilgrims had landed on the west coast they would've crossed the Rockies and immediately turned around and gone back.