I Just Don't Get It

So all the usual suspects are foaming at the mouth because of Obama's endorsement of marriage equality.

Quelle surprise. BREAKING: the sun rises in the east.

At least for me, all their yammering on about the sanctity of marriage is simply becoming so much background noise. While Obama has yet to do anything concrete to back up his supposed "evolution" on the matter, it still feels like a seismic shift has occurred in the American psyche. As I said to a coworker today, "The dam has burst, and there's no turning back."

After what happened in North Carolina on Tuesday, Obama's announcement was nothing less than a thing of beauty and a very stiff middle finger pointed straight in their direction.

But what I really don't understand—and maybe I really shouldn't waste any more brain power because of the inherent stupidity associated with it—is why all these knuckle-dragging Christofascists are so upset that it's happening. I mean, if they take it as a sign of  the imminent arrival of their beloved "End Times" ("Ooh Santa is coming tonight!) why aren't they embracing it?  Don't they want their invisible sky fairy to finally descend from the heavens, reveal himself to all the unbelievers and condemn the Atheists, gays, abortionists, Muslims, yada, yada, (basically anyone who isn't them), to eternal damnation and never-ending hellfire so they can stand there smugly with their arms crossed and say, "I told you so!"?

Is it maybe because in their shriveled little black hate-filled hearts, while they have no doubts whatsoever about the existence of hell and the righteous judgment of unrepentant sinners, they do have doubts that maybe—just maybe—their names won't be found written in the desired column on Jeebus's Big List of Naughty and Nice^®?

Let's face it: we're human. Who among us hasn't done something we shouldn't have. Show me someone who claims that he's never lied and I'll show you a liar. (The same goes for masturbation.) And the ones who are always screaming most loudly about GAWWWWD are the ones bathing in champagne and pissing out their penthouse windows on the masses below.

Wasn't it their very own Lord and Savior^® himself who supposedly said, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone?"

I've thought about this probably more than I should have, and this is the only explanation I can come up with. They have that one little bit of doubt about their own worthiness to enter the Magic Kingdom that's bouncing around in their empty skulls, and basically, deep down, they're scared shitless.