Jurassic World

Maybe I’ve just gotten jaded. Or maybe the hype surrounding this movie was so overwhelming and relentless that it couldn’t possibly measure up to the expectations.

Don’t get me wrong; it was worth the price of admission. It’s a fun summer movie. But the words predictable and variations-on-a-theme immediately come to mind.

The story takes up twenty two years after the original Jurassic Park film ended, with none of the sequels presumably having happened. Having learned nothing from that outing, InGen has apparently proceeded full steam ahead and opened the park to hordes of visitors.

Plot synopsis (and spoilers) from Wikipedia:

Twenty-two years after the events of Jurassic Park, InGen has opened a fully functional dinosaur theme park called “Jurassic World” on Isla Nublar. Brothers Zach and Gray Mitchell go to visit their aunt Claire Dearing (Bryce Dallas Howard), the park’s operations manager, but she is too busy to see them and instead leaves them with her assistant Zara. InGen’s geneticists have created a new genetically modified dinosaur called Indominus Rex made from the DNA of several predatory dinosaurs, as well as modern animals such as cuttlefish and tree frogs. Simon Masrani (Irrfan Khan), the park’s owner, orders Velociraptor trainer Owen Grady (Chris Prattto inspect the Indominus’ enclosure before the exhibit opens.

Vic Hoskins (Vincent D’Onofrio), the head of InGen security, is interested in training the park’s four Velociraptors for use in the military, but Owen argues that the raptors are not tame enough to do so. While Zara is distracted, Gray and Zach leave her and explore Jurassic World’s attractions. When Owen arrives at the Indominus enclosure, he and Claire find that the Indominus has seemingly scaled the wall and escaped. Owen and two other staff enter the enclosure, but the Indominus ambushes them, having faked its escape, and kills both staff before breaking out and disappearing into the jungle. Owen escapes by hiding under a vehicle and cutting the fuel hose to douse himself in gasoline, masking his scent.

Masrani orders a group of armed guards to capture the Indominus, but it kills all of them. Claire closes off the northern section of the park and orders for the island to be evecuated. Gray and Zach enter the “gyrosphere” ride and drive it into a forest, where they are confronted by the Indominus. They escape by jumping from a waterfall, and eventually discover the ruins of the original Jurassic Park Visitor Center, where they repair a Jeep and drive back to the park. The Indominus continues its rampage, killing several Apatosaurus and breaking into the park’s pterosaur aviary. Masrani and two soldiers follow the Indominus in a helicopter, but the freed pterosaurs cause the helicopter to crash. Gray and Zach return to the park as the pterosaurs attack several tourists. Zara finds them, but is soon picked up by a Pteranodon and dropped into the Jurassic World Lagoon, where the park’s Mosasaurus eats her. Owen and Claire are reunited with Gray and Zach, while more armed guards shoot down the pterosaurs.

Hoskins takes command of Jurassic World and decides to use the Velociraptors to find and kill the Indominus, with Owen reluctantly agreeing. The raptors follow the Indominus’ scent into the jungle, and Owen and a handful of InGen soldiers launch an attack. However, the Indominus is able to communicate with the raptors and turns them against the soldiers. Meanwhile, Hoskins has Dr. Henry Wu, the park’s chief geneticist, board a helicopter with some of the dinosaur embryos and leave the park. Returning to the main park, Owen, Claire, Zach and Gray find Hoskins packing up the remaining dinosaur embryos in the Innovation Center’s laboratory. Hoskins plans to create more genetically modified dinosaurs and use them as weapons, but he is suddenly attacked and killed by a raptor.

Owen leads Claire, Zach and Gray outside, and when they are confronted by the other raptors he manages to re-establish a connection with them. The Indominusappears and kills most of the raptors. Realising they are outmatched, Claire lures the park’s veteran Tyrannosaurus rex into a fight with the Indominus. The last surviving raptor, named “Blue”, aids the Tyrannosaurus in the fight, but the Indominus overpowers them both. They force the Indominus towards the Jurassic World Lagoon, where the Mosasaurus drags it into the water, drowning it. The Tyrannosaurus departs, and Blue shares one more moment with Owen before leaving as well. The next day, the surviving tourists are evacuated to Costa Rica. Zach and Gray are reunited with their parents, while Owen and Claire decide to stay together. On Isla Nublar, the Tyrannosaurus stands on a building’s helipad, overlooks the island and roars.

Chris Pratt is yummy, as usual. To be honest—much like with Channing Tatum—I would probably be happy to just sit and watch him read the dictionary for two hours. Since the nasty InGen folks made off with viable embryos, I’m sure we’ll be hearing word of yet another sequel in coming years. Because humanity never learns. Take that as you will.

 

Some Initial Thoughts

Being the fanboy that I am, I wasn’t going to let the fact that Apple’s unveiling of its new shiny a week ago left me nonplussed stand in the way of an opportunity to take said new shiny out for a test drive.

This time however, I was going to do it the right way. After a crash and burn disaster I experienced with one of the Yosemite betas last year that forced me to wipe everything and reload from scratch (I went into it with my eyes open, so I have no one to blame but myself for loading it onto my main partition), I swore I wasn’t going to run any more…at least not off my main drive.

So says the guy who’s currently running the 10.10.4 beta as his main OS. (But hey, that’s different. Right?)

Anyhow…that being said, at first blush El Capitan is wicked fast; so much faster than Yosemite—even running via USB3.0 on an external SSD. There’s none of the screen lag that permeates Yosemite. Safari pages come up instantly. I’m very impressed. It will be interesting to see how the system matures over the next several months.

#ThingsIWillNotMissAboutDenver

        • SNOW
        • bipolar weather
        • Denver drivers
        • cracked, broken, concrete streets
        • suspension-destroying potholes everywhere
        • not being able to keep my car clean for more than 24 hours
        • stop lights that impede the flow of traffic rather than facilitate it
        • Colorado Boulevard
        • the constant smell of burning garbage…I mean pot
        • continually dry, cracked skin
        • being totally winded after climbing two flights of stairs
        • dealing with a horrible commute going to a job I absolutely loathe
        • grooved pavement that makes me think my steering is going out
        • all of my coworkers except two
        • people who don’t know—or don’t care—what a solid stripe of whatever color on a road means
        • tornado watches/warnings
        • Canadian flying rats…er…geese
        • daylight fucking savings time
        • fast food restaurants that have no clue about what “fast” means
        • water at every public restroom faucet being freezing cold
        • the intersection of Abeline and Alameda in Aurora
        • freeway onramps designed like a drag race (no, not the RuPaul kind)
        • traffic lights that have no consistent pattern (sometimes left turn before green, sometimes after) (red light, followed by red light, followed by red light)
        • a stop light at every intersection on a street
        • businesses with only one entrance to their parking lots
        • parking lots where you can’t get from one side or the other, requiring you to exit the parking lot to get back in, or drive in front of the store to get across (Target on Havana, I’m pointing my finger at you)
        • every street being curved and hilly
        • one way streets (yes, i know Phoenix has some, but not like Denver)
        • dreading the arrival of autumn instead of celebrating it

And lastly…working for DISH.

Meh.

Even though I am an unapologetic fanboy, Apple’s WWDC keynote today—unlike in years past—left me unenthused. I saw nothing that had me screaming, “I need this now.”

I’m glad, however, that this year they aren’t adding another 200 features to OS X. I’m relieved to see them finally focusing on under the hood fixes and improvements. But El CapitanReally? With the entire state of California to choose from, this is the best name they could come up with?

Whatever. After being plagued with problems big and small in OS X for the last several years, Apple could really use some Snow Leopard stability at this point, and I hope this release finally addresses that. I want to be able to tell people again, “it just works” and actually mean it.

As for iOS, I’m pretty nonchalant. Unlike OS X, there isn’t really a whole lot I’ve found myself getting excited about during its the various iterations. It runs my phone. As long as it works, that’s good enough for me. Unlike some people who are absolutely dependent upon their phones for their entire online existence, I’m still very old school, preferring to do all my serious work on my laptop. Maybe that explains it.

As for the Apple Watch and it’s upcoming OS upgrade, all I can say is I’ve yet to find a single compelling reason to buy one. Perhaps a few years down the road I’ll get one and find myself saying (like I have with other tech) “OH MY GOD, WHY DIDN’T I GET THIS YEARS AGO?!?”

We’ll see.

Quote of the Day

“You may not have heard it here first, but hear it now: the 2016 GOP primary season is going to be a mind-killing bloodbath of legendary proportions, primarily because almost everyone involved so far has no business being in a national conversation about the tallest seat in the land, and there is still space on the clown bus waiting to be filled.” ~ William Rivers Pitt, Truthout

Read the whole thing here.

I am Cautiously Optimistic

Childhood’s End is one of my all-time favorite sci-fi books. So many other stories have borrowed (or outright stolen) images and ideas that Arthur C. Clarke came up with decades earlier.

It also doesn’t hurt that easy-on-the-eyes Mike Vogel is in a starring role.

I’m looking forward to December!

An Open Letter to Christians

Dear Christians,

No disrespect, but…

How could you possibly believe in Christianity?

Forget about the woman from a rib, the walking-talking snake, the burning bush, the man trapped in a whale, Noah’s Ark, and the tower of Babel. I get that not everyone believes that. After all, that is obviously ridiculous. But what about the virgin birth, water to wine, zombies, resurrections, ancient prophecies, and eternal paradise and/or torture? Are those things any less ridiculous?

I mean, what kind of God needs this kind of elaborate scheme to “save” humanity. Do you really believe God sent his holy sperm – I mean spirit – to impregnate a virgin, wait 33 years and then allow his only “begotten” son (whatever that means) to be tortured and die for three days so that he could resurrect him and then demand through the words of flawed humans over the course of 66 poorly written books that people worship him or be tortured for all eternity? What is God’s obsession with blood all about?

Think about it for a minute. If I told you that story you would laugh your ass off and send me to a mental institute. Look, I get that our culture reinforces your belief and that you were taught this stuff all your life from before you could walk and talk, but you were also taught about Santa Claus and now we can all admit that is just a make-believe story. I mean flying reindeer, right? Only a five-year-old would buy that shit — but a virgin woman popping out the son of God? Totally legit.

I’m not talking about belief in a god in general here. I get why someone might find the concept of some vague higher power alluring despite the complete lack of evidence, but when we are talking about the specific beliefs and claims of Christianity, we have to take a moment and really think about just how ridiculous those beliefs are.

Can we all just admit that the Bible is fiction and move on with our lives?

I mean, how is it that we are entertaining a serious debate about whether there was a historical magic man/deity? We might as well be debating the historicity of Hercules or Darth Vader.

I’m not angry at you or your imaginary deity; I’m just confused and maybe even a little frustrated. Just imagine one day waking up in a world where everyone worshiped Voldemort and quoted the Harry Potter books as if they were historical and inerrant. One might point out that they are obviously fictional books written by J.K. Rawling, but believers would be quick to claim that she wrote them while under Harry Potter’s spell and that these books were absolutely true. The Ministry of Magic just made her think that she was writing fiction in order to hide the world of magic from Muggles. Whatever criticism, plot hole, argument, or point against the “Truth” of the Harry Potter books one come up with, the believers will have some sort of rationalization for them.

If you met one person who believed that, you could easily dismiss them as crazy but when millions or billions of people believe it, then what? Does it make it any less crazy? I don’t think it does.

This is the case with Christianity. It is a crazy belief system that simply does not match up with the evidence we see every day. If the God of the Bible existed, he wouldn’t need you to tell everyone about him. He could do his own damn dirty work. There would be no need for threats of eternal Hell or promises of eternal paradise. God wouldn’t need to sacrifice his own son or anyone else. If God wanted people “saved” from himself, then poof… done. There would be no need to shed holy blood or for any elaborate schemes.

There would be no hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, or diseases. And if they did exist, they would only affect those God wanted to punish. We certainly wouldn’t see believers and non-believers affected at exactly the same rate. Please face reality, your religion isn’t true, the Bible is fiction, and God is imaginary. Then we can move past all this ancient superstition and start working toward making a brighter future for everyone. Just think about it. Thanks.

Source.

Rolodex of Hate

Last night Ben and I saw Bianca Del Rio’s perform her Rolodex of Hate at the Paramount Theater. It was fabulous. I can’t recall the last time I laughed so hard. The girl is brilliant. It’s no wonder she won the last season of Drag Race, and why this season’s contestants all seem so…unremarkable.

If you have a chance to see her in person, by all means make the effort. You won’t be disappointed.

Atmospheric

After being bombarded with promos at work (at one point it was the company-wide forced Windows wallpaper), out of curiosity last year we started watching Showtime’s Penny Dreadful. I have to admit that the story  got off to a rather slow start, but it was intriguing enough that we stuck with it, and it’s now become one of my most anticipated viewings every week. As we were watching the last episode, I realized how much I liked the theme, Deminonde, so I went off to iTunes and grabbed the whole album.

No regrets whatsoever on that purchase. I can only describe it as atmospheric. Kind of moody, kind of reflective, with a contemplative undertone running throughout. It immediately became my go-to commute music, offering a nice, quiet counterpoint to the abrasive stupidity I encounter on Denver highways, and great music to write to.

I’d never heard of this particular composer, Abel Korzeniowski, but I’m hearing a lot of different influences in the music. In Street. Horse. Smell. Candle. I almost felt he was paying homage to James Newton Howard’s Signs soundtrack.

One reviewer wrote:

PENNY DREADFUL Soundtrack Will Unsettle and Disturb

Showtime’s Penny Dreadful provided a story caught between horror and poetry with long monologues, superior acting and immaculate costume work. These aspects created a very strong tone, but the score was the final touch — solidifying the never ending, disturbed and unsettling mood. Composer Abel Korzeniowski (A Single ManW.E.) proves that he is more than adept at creating a horrifying, creeping tingle that will climb up any listener’s spines. The Gothic horror sounds of the orchestra Korzeniowski uses transport listeners to a dark old London where the walls are alive and the hairs on their neck stand on end.

There is a very clear overall feel to the soundtrack. The order of the songs could be randomized and the tone would remain the same. After the opening with “Demimonde” (the opening theme of the show) the listener will be treated to a crushing song, “First Blood”, delivering a haunting sense of impending doom. It will be hard for some listeners to sit still with the strings and drums pushing their ears and minds to run as fast as they can. Many of the tracks are beautiful (particularly “Dorian Gray”), nearly appropriate for what one would imagine dancing was like in old London. These tracks, though less creepy, never lose the dark tones, there is always an impending sense of horror, darkness and futility.

Penny Dreadful’s soundtrack is everything that a film composer wants. It not only fits within the tone of the show but can create it without any visuals. Korzeniowski has proven himself as a TV Drama series composer with this album and will hopefully return for the second season. The vibrant sounds of this album are sure to please any fans of classical or soundtrack music, as well as anyone seeking to be unsettled with beauty, after all “to be beautiful is to be almost dead.”

If you haven’t seen the series, check out the teasers below:

As If He Had a Snowball’s Chance in Hell to Begin With…

Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee made a statement on Facebook Friday addressing the revelations that eldest son Josh Duggar admitted to sexually molesting “girls,” presumably his own sisters, as a teenager.

The former Arkansas governor largely defended the actions of the family since the abuse and said he wanted to “affirm” support for the family. “Josh’s actions when he was an underage teen are as he described them himself, ‘inexcusable,’ but that doesn’t mean ‘unforgivable,’” Huckabee’s statement said. The Duggar family endorsed former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum in the 2012 election, but have backed Huckabee for the Republican presidential nomination this time around.

Huckabee continued, “No purpose whatsoever is served by those who are now trying to discredit Josh or his family by sensationalizing the story. Good people make mistakes and do regrettable and even disgusting things. The reason that the law protects disclosure of many actions on the part of a minor is that the society has traditionally understood something that today’s blood-thirsty media does not understand—that being a minor means that one’s judgement is not mature.”

(more)

UPDATE: Absolutely Fucking Unbelievable. And the judge was appointed by Huckabee.

Clown Car


Although to be perfectly fair, this image pretty much sums up any candidate and their money source these days…