Author: Mark Alexander

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Looking Ahead, Making Plans

One of the things Ben and I have decided needs to happen once his mom moves out is that our place needs a makeover. We’ve talked about painting an accent wall in the living room and both bedrooms for quite some time now, and while we haven’t actually gotten around to doing it, it has prompted a conversation on how the whole place needs a bit of a refresh to get the taste of the last year completely out.

The leather sofa I bought five years ago is falling apart at the seams. It came with a ten year warranty, but since I foolishly tossed out the receipt at some point, we’re outta luck on getting it repaired. But I can say that now, after finally owning a leather couch, it’s not something I want again. Back to a nice fabric, thankyouverymuch—and preferably one that can be removed and easily cleaned.

Since we won’t have two dogs running around who seem to think the entire apartment is their personal toilet any more, we can also think about getting a rug put back down in the living room. It’s also time for new bedding, drapes, and lamps in the bedroom.

Ben’s into bright colors. I’m more muted and earth-toned. But I think we’ve found things we can both agree on. The all-wool rug is a big-ticket item, but we both love the colors and think it’s worth every penny.

I’m really looking forward to this!

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Comments Have Been Disabled

When I started this blog all those many years ago I did it as a public extension of the private journals I had been keeping since the late 1980s. It was a way for me to vent my frustration at the way any number of things in life—particularly the political landscape of the Bush years—were heading.

I have been doing a lot of bitching and moaning about my personal life lately, and while those posts make up a really small portion of the overall blog, apparently some people are getting annoyed and are threatening to stop visiting my site.

My response? I don’t care. To those people I say no one is forcing you to come here, and frankly if you stopped, I wouldn’t even know. I don’t track my visitor stats, so your threats to stop reading are akin to telling an Atheist he’s damned and going to hell.

And lastly to paraphrase that famous line from The Rocky Horror Picture Show , “I didn’t make it for you.”

So until further notice, commenting has been disabled. I have enough bullshit to deal with right now without also having to deal with people whining about what I write.

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We Have Died and Gone to HELL

It’s the only explanation.

I don’t remember the exact moment of our deaths. I don’t know if it was shortly before we were scheduled to move to Denver, or if it happened en route, or if it was—most likely—February 2013, when she arrived; the Destroyer of Worlds.

As I lay wide awake at 4:15 am this morning—again—I started quietly sobbing because I realized that my friend Cindy was right a year ago when she learned that we were moving Ben’s mom up “temporarily” and told me, “She’s never going to leave.”

After five trips to the ER in the last 30 days for uncontrolled neuralgia in spite of a steady diet of beer and morphine (yes, at the same time), she’s now decided to go out on short term disability for the next six weeks. WHY? What is this going to accomplish? Are we going to see any real change—like seeing a doctor who will do anything other than rubber-stamp another scrip for pain meds or god forbid, checking herself into rehab to get off the stuff to begin with—or is it just going to be six weeks of more self-medicating and endless Judge Judy blaring from our guest room?

I asked Ben if this was going to affect her move out date since she will still be drawing her full salary and he said it wouldn’t.  As much as I’d like to believe that I have no faith it’s going to happen. She’s already talking about returning the bedding she bought for her own place, so I’m sure  something is going to happen that will prevent her from moving out yet AGAIN.

At this point I fear the only way to get her out of here is for Ben and I to move back into a one bedroom apartment when our lease expires at the end of August.

When she’s working, she’s on an odd shift so she normally doesn’t get home until around 7:30 pm, giving me a couple hours of alone time (Ben doesn’t normally get home before 7 either) to unwind from work. But now I’ve even lost that brief respite from her crazy. For the next six weeks I’ll be going directly from work to Starbucks until Ben gets home because I simply can no longer abide being around her if he’s not there.

I never believed in a real, physical Hell, but I’m really starting to question it now.

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If It Walks Like A Duck…

From The Advocate:

Sherri Shepherd, a cohost of The View, claims she’s not homophobic just because she believes homosexuality is a sin and LGBT people are going to hell.

Shepherd sought to defend herself in a recent interview withFusion host Alicia Menendez. When Menendez asked what Shepherd felt has been the biggest misconception about her has been throughout her career, she said it was that people had labeled her antigay — unfairly, in her opinion. Shepherd insisted she had no malice toward LGBT people, saying her beliefs are the result of her Christian background and though she hates the sin, she still loves the sinner.

“I think people don’t know my heart,” Shepherd told Menendez. “I think people feel I’m very judgmental. I think people feel I’m very homophobic. If they knew me, and knew my heart. … You grow up being a Christian and you grow up believing homosexuality is a sin; you’re going to hell if you’re a homosexual. This is something that they teach in churches. So it’s something that I grew up believing.”

“I might not agree with your lifestyle, but I love you,” Shepherd continued. “You may not agree with my lifestyle, but you love me … I don’t say it’s a choice. If you tell me, ‘Sherri, I was born gay.’ OK. I’m not gonna argue with you, because I can’t tell you how you feel and what’s going on inside. I’m trying to make it into heaven by the skin of my teeth … I don’t know who I’m gonna see. So if you tell me you’re born [gay], I’m not gonna argue with you. And I absolutely respect you for that. I just ask that people respect how I feel, [I] respect how you feel and we can have a great dialogue.”

All I have to say is…

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