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Go Ahead

“You know you’re doing a horrible job of covering up your sniffing right? Like I can fully see and hear you huffing. I’m wearing headphones man. Why would you even be working this close to me. You gotta figure out a way to be a perv a lil’ more covertly. If you tried that with another guy he’d probably knock your lights out. I just trying to help you buddy. I don’t wear deodorant so I can find boys like you. Sure not all gays like the smell of a rank man. They complain or talk shit, but the ones that do like a man’s scent are more than worth the hate from the ones that don’t. You stink loving piggies are a different breed… not afraid to try things. Will do anything to make a man nut. It’s not just that I don’t wear deodorant boy. I use unscented soap too. Everything on me smells exactly like it was meant to. Root around my body kiddo see what else you like. Don’t worry it’s just us here.”

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Scenes From a Road Trip: Roswell, NM

In August 2000, I made a major road trip from San Francisco to Roswell, New Mexico. Why you ask? Mostly because I’d never been, and was in the thrall of the series Roswell at the time. (Even then I was much older than their target audience, but I found the series compelling, and I had to admit that Jason Behr in the role of Max Evans was dreamy….

But I digress.

Since visiting Roswell was not on our original itinerary but within the scope of our trip via a small detour, Ben and I decided to change our original plans and visit the place. He had never been there, and I wanted to do some “then and now” photos and figured this was a good chance to do so.

Of course, the only real tourist destination in Roswell is the International UFO Museum and Research Center on Main Street. It was a cheese-fest when I was there in 2000 and had no reason to believe it would be any different 22 years later.

August 2000
March 2022
August 2000
March 2022
August 2000
March 2022

And in case anyone was wondering, yes…the place remains just as cheesy as it was 22 years ago, although they’ve definitely upped their game as far as the displays are concerned.

August 2000: This was their premiere display that greeted you the moment you walked in. There really wasn’t much else worth looking at beyond this.
March 2022: I guess a budget increase allowed them to hire more mannequins.
Although Nurse Ratched seems to be saying, “WTF do you expect me to do with this?!”
And now with added crash wreckage for your enjoyment—and now it’s tucked in a back corner of the facility! (Notice the suit guy’sright hand. Is *he* an alien?)
A crash-test dummy – the government’s latest attempt to explain away eye witness reports of alien beings having survived the crash.
Ben: I look constipated!
Finally found someone taller than Ben (although to be honest if they were both at the same level – DO NOT STAND ON STAGE! – I think it would be pretty close. And what, exactly “The Day The Earth Stood Still” has to do with Roswell remains a mystery. (They now featured a display of the 2000 Roswell television series, so there’s that.)
They are absolutely NO fun at parties. So judgey.
Karen did not appreciate the review left of her anal probing and is demanding to speak to a manager RIGHT NOW.
Of course everything in Roswell has an alien theme, including the streetlights downtown.

Was the International UFO Museum and Research Center worth a visit if you’re passing through town, ultimately heading somewhere else? Yes. The gift shop alone is worth the “outrageous” $5.00 admission. Is it a destination worth making a trip all the way from another state? Oh hell naw. I remember thinking in 2000, “I drove all that way for this?!“