6, 7, and especially 8!
What It's Like Being Married to a Professional Educator
Being married to a teacher is great. Nobody works harder. Nobody is more motivated. Nobody is more ready and willing to correct your poor grammar. Nevertheless, there are a few things you should know about being married to a professional educator.
1. Your dinner dates will constantly be interrupted.
Think Friday night means it's time to kick back, relax, and enjoy the company of your significant other at that new restaurant that just opened up? Maybe. Chances are you'll make it to dinner. But chances are higher that, just as the waiter is bringing your herb-crusted, non-GMO, something-or-other to the table, your beloved will get a call from her principal outlining the new school strategy for standardized testing. Or she'll see an email from little Johnny's father lambasting the fact that he only got a 98 on the last pop-quiz. And you'll sip your wine in solitude and check your Twitter feed while your wife performs educational triage in the parking lot.
2. It's easy to take conversations with adults for granted.
I go to the office every morning. And talk to adults. And work with adults. But my wife doesn't. She goes for hours at a time every day without conversing with anyone over the age of 13. When we're both home, sometimes I catch her staring at me with an odd look, hanging on my every word while I talk about some mundane conversation I had at the office. She'll interrupt me: "You mean NOBODY in your office had horrible BO? Or cried because their girlfriend broke up with them? Or inexplicably fell out of their chair while you were talking to them? You're so lucky!" Lucky indeed.
3. Your spouse will always be a better parent than you.
I've been a dad for almost six years and I like to think that I have this parenthood thing down pat. But I have nothing on my wife. Her daily focus is getting the best out of dozens of kids. Making them do things they don't want to do and providing a hundred types of support in a thousand different ways. Every time I think I've had some type of amazing breakthrough with my kids (got all of our kindergarten sight words on the first try!) I quickly realize it's because she's already laid the groundwork (reading with them since they were 6 weeks old!). Sometimes it's easy to forget how great a teacher she is. But then I look at what she's done with our children and I remember.
4. Halloween demands constant vigilance.
We live very close to my wife's school. All her students know where we live. I see how low the egg inventory gets at the grocery store the last week of October. You better believe I spend Halloween on my front porch with a raised eyebrow, a flashlight, and a grimace.
5. Nobody multitasks like a teacher.
Until I married my wife, I had never seen someone who could simultaneously cook, soothe a crying baby, talk on the phone, and make lesson plans. But then I realized her day is full of doing a thousand things at the same time. She reads, teaches, conducts parent conferences, referees, participates in faculty meetings, plans summer school, coaches the flag football team, and finds some way to squeeze in bathroom breaks, all while managing a hoard of hormonal preteens. And I thought mowing the lawn while holding a beer was a big deal.
6. You will never EVER win an argument about work.
Me: "Man, I had a rough day at work. My morning meeting didn't go well, I have a big project due tomorrow, and our yearly reviews are coming up."
Her: "A kid in my first period class farted so much I had to teach in the gym for the rest of the day."
7. Your spouse will never be the only teacher in your life.
Teachers flock to other teachers. It's a scientific fact. Any party we go to, my wife unconsciously seeks the other teachers there. It's like her ears are tuned to the word "pre-planning." And then she spends the evening in deep conversation with someone she's never met while I hover by the punch bowl and blink at the wall. The number of adults in my life who are educators is obscene. On the bright side, I appreciate a fully-functioning photocopier more than I ever thought possible.
8. Your spouse is a hero who saves the world every single day.
I could never be a teacher. And I know I'm not in the minority. Many people don't realize it, but being a teacher is challenging, and tedious and about as unglamorous as a profession can be. But my wife doesn't care. She does it in spite of little recognition, low pay, and long hours. (Three months off in the summer isn't a thing, ok? My wife has maybe three weeks completely disconnected from school in July and she spends those planning for the coming year.) She knows it's more than a job. It's a calling. A way to make the word a better place at a fundamental, actionable level. And I feel lucky to see it happen on a daily basis.