Category: Social Media

…without any context whatsoever that truly piss me off. (3rd World Problems, I know.) But seriously, where is this nightmare? No idea.

To be honest, it reminds me a lot of the approach to the Bay Bridge in Oakland, but the direction of traffic is wrong and the Bay Bridge backup—while it can be horrific at times—was never this bad.

The only social media I'm on these days is Instagram (and, well, Twitter, but only for the pr0n). Since Instagram seems to be turning into a video platform, I've noticed more and more stupid appearing; people doing shit that—if there wasn't a camera involved—probably wouldn't do in the first place.

I originally got on Instagram a dozen or so years ago for the photography (both of menz and otherwise), but between this new video trend and the ever-annoying ads for shit that you will never buy, I'm rapidly reaching the point where the ratio of enjoyment to annoyance is tilting in the annoyance range. (That was the point I was at when I ditched Twitter many years ago, and the only reason I recently returned was because I grew tired of having to click that "sensitive content" warning label each and every time I was looking at anyone's um…"interesting" tweets. I do not participate in Twitter, and I steer clear of anything or anyone even remotely political.)

I'm not sure if this is just me or if it's a scattered system-wide issue. A quick internet search reveals that Twitter is abuzz with reports of people getting this notification.

It's weird because I can still access my Insta on the web (albeit with "stories" blanked out), but if I try to use the Instagram app I can't do or see anything. I haven't posted anything that is likely to piss the algorithm off, but I do remember leaving a particularly snarky comment on one of those "politically sensitive" posts a couple days ago. Or maybe it's just because I report nearly every ad that scrolls past as spam?

And of course, there's no way of contacting them—because it's FaceFuck.

If the account doesn't come back up by tomorrow I'll take it as a sign that it's time to leave social media entirely.

(To be filed under shameless self-promotion.)

Whenever I request to follow someone on Instagram—especially if its someone I know in real life—I always do a quick run through my own Insta.  (Link at right.) It's not that I'm ashamed of anything I've posted—and anyone who knows me knows me—but rather just to get a sense of what I'm presenting to the world; what kind of artificially beautiful view of my life I'm putting out there.

I did the same thing last night after accepting a follow request from my old boss in San Francisco (I'd been following his nearly empty account for quite some time). I wondered what he'd think of the boy (and by boy, I mean I was 39 the last time we had any interaction and was ten years younger than that when he'd hired on as an architectural drafter in that tiny 3-person office back in 1987.

I have to say that I'm quite happy with what I've put out there. I spent quite some time scrolling back to the beginning, back to 2012 when I recreated my account after, in a fit of madness, deleted my original account when Facebook took over the platform.

My only regret is that there are a lot of duplicate images, mostly of the #tbt (Throwback Thursday) variety. I mean, when you've posted nearly eight years of photos there are bound to be duplicates, right?

I removed myself from Facebook years ago. I gave up Twitter back in July. The only remaining social media platform I'm still on is Instagram, and while I know it's probably just as evil as Facebook, I just can't give it up yet. (Although the constant barrage of random ads for absolute shit that pepper the feed on the mobile app is pushing me in that direction.) I enjoy my feed of "bears, vinyl collectors, men who apparently don't own a single shirt among the lot of them, drag queens, d-list celebrities, and alcoholics" as I like to call it. And where do you think a lot of the menz I post here come from. C'mon…

My account is locked down, but if any of you want to follow along, just send a request and maybe leave a comment here or send an email (link at right under "Warning") to let me know its you. Maybe you're already following and I just don't know…but I'd like to!

We should take the "does it spark joy?" question to social media. Go through your Facebook and remove friends that do not spark joy. Go through instagram and unfollow people and pages that do not spark joy. Don't surround yourself with things that don't make you happy." ~ renegadebusiness via Tumblr

Bye, Jack. You can go fuck yourself.

It wasn't the general rise in the level of toxicity over the last eight years, or the constant stream of daily st00pid that manifested there that did it—especially after I stopped following pretty much anything politically focused weeks ago. It was today's news that Twitter had updated its "hateful conduct" rules, which—starting immediately—ban "dehumanizing language" on the "basis of religion." So now, in other words, it will no longer be acceptable to call stupid Christians Stupid Christians…or to make fun of someone's belief in 3-day-old risen zombies. Or God [irony] knows what else. They should've called it what it is: The No Blasphemy Rule.

Racism and the rest of right wing neo-nazi hate speech is apparently still okay, but now God [irony] forbid you should make a disparaging comment about someone's belief in magical invisible sky fairies.

So instead of being ultimately booted off for being mean to some snowflake believer, I'm choosing instead to leave on my own terms. I guess I'll just have to live without Vaca Muerta Estates and the Apple Anon community.

So fuck you, Twitter.

And now that just leaves me Instagram.

Do kids need social media accounts?

I'm not a parent, but this is a question I've often pondered vicariously. I wouldn't even know how to navigate raising a child in today's always-on, always-available, always-connected-and-posting environment.

I ran across this article earlier today and it really resonated, especially since I'm considering dumping my two remaining social media accounts, Instagram and Twitter, completely:

From Bradley Chambers at 9to5 Mac:

A few weeks ago, I got asked by a local church to talk to their parents about strategies to help monitor their kids' social media use. This topic is one I get asked about a lot, and I know that a lot of parents are struggling with it. When they brought me up there, they were looking for a silver bullet of an app, service, or method to use to help make sure their kids don't get into trouble on social media. I started the talk with a simple statement: your kids don't need social media accounts and you don't either.

Do kids need social media accounts?

Before you immediately close the page, hear me out. Facebook has now been around for 15 years, Twitter has been around for 13 years, and Instagram has been around for 8 years. These services have become engrained in our lives. My oldest son who is almost nine doesn't know a world without them. All of my kids have grown up with Wi-Fi, super-fast internet, iPads, and iPhones. For them, technology is a way of life. For me (I'm in my mid–30s), I grew up without so much of it. That's not to say we didn't have computers in the house (we did), but I didn't grow up with social media, mobile devices, or much of what the current generation has. I grew up playing computer games (Quake, Doom, etc.), Nintendo 64, PlayStation, Dreamcast, etc. We didn't feel the pressure to get likes, retweets, or become a social media influencer. We had the pressure of knowing the best plays in NCAA football. In hindsight, we had it much better. How did we get here? How did we get to a place where you have document everything for the world to see?

As I continued the discussion, I asked one of the parents, what are your goals for your life? They gave me a few things, and I asked how Facebook or Instagram helped with that? They said it didn't. I then asked the same parent about their goals for their kids. They gave me a few answers, and I asked how a Facebook account helped with that. They agreed it didn't. My next question was how many people have read something on Facebook that made them mad? Basically, the entire room had their hand up. I think that was the eye-opening moment for a lot of them. They realized that social media wasn't helping them accomplish their goals, and it was making them angry.

As I proceeded, I discussed the dangers for kids using social media. I mentioned that the parents of the 80s and 90s kids were concerned about their kids having computers in their room. Now, we give kids free access to the internet with a device that fits in their pocket, and we're surprised when they make poor decisions? Let me say this plain and simple: kids can ruin their lives by what they say on social media, and they don't need it. I mentioned this to a friend, and their response was that we need to let kids have access, but help them to learn how to handle it. My response was why don't we let 14-year-olds drive? We need to realize that giving kids the ability to say whatever they want to the world is a recipe for disaster. When kids screw up on social media, why are we surprised? I know that I would have said some absolutely stupid things on the internet if Facebook had been around when I was a teenager.

For my three kids, my wife and I have made the decision that they will not have social media while they are under my supervision. If they want to get a Facebook account when they are in college — so be it. They will be old enough to understand the consequences of their actions (and deal with them). I just don't believe a 15 or 16-year-old kid is old enough to handle it. I am going to help my kids avoid growing up in a digital world that is unrelenting in its ability to warp your vision of self-worth. I don't want my kids worrying about if they got unfollowed by someone or got enough likes. I want them to worry about making good grades, having fun, and enjoying being a kid. I've had a lot of people say that they will sneak and do it on their own. That is a good possibility, but as soon as I find out, there will be swift punishment. Having social media accounts is not a human right (nor is having access to technology). We are the parents, and we will make the rules for our house.

Wrap-up

So to recap, for all the goals I have for my kids, social media doesn't help them accomplish them. My wife and I haven't had a Facebook account in almost a decade, and I've never missed it. I deleted my Instagram account years ago. I keep Twitter and LinkedIn around for professional reasons, but if you told me that my future income wasn't based on having some sort of online identity, I would delete them as well. I am setting an example for my kids that we'd rather look at a beautiful scene of nature to enjoy it rather than having to "snap it for the 'Gram". We take family photos for ourselves rather than having to post everything we do for the world to see. Try signing out of Facebook and Instagram for a month and see if your life improves. I also encourage you to listen to this episode of Analog(ue) where Casey Liss and Stephen Hackett discuss posting photos of your kids online.

For all the parents looking for ways to help manage and monitor your kids' social media accounts, ask yourself if they really need them. If it's something you have to monitor daily, is it really a good idea?

I stopped following 300+ Twitter accounts tonight, basically anything or anyone political. I'd reached the point that I had to do something, and short of canceling my account altogether (believe me, I thought about it), I figured this might be a good stopgap measure to keep the relentless flood of negativity from consuming me.

I read this afternoon that Instagram has become the latest hotbed of activity for Nazis and right-wing supremacists, which is sad because I still genuinely like the Insta, but I may be faced with saying goodbye to that sooner rather than later since the company seems uninterested in or incapable of policing their service to keep that sort of garbage from posting. Nazi propaganda is fine, but put up an exposed penis and they're on you within minutes. Go figger.

…would be for Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram to all go out of business. Shuttering Twitter especially would finally silence The Orange Russian Menace in the White House and starve him of the attention his malignant narcissism demands. It might also go a long way toward restoring some semblance of civility in society when the ignorant among us no longer have such a ready venue to spew that ignorance like monkeys flinging feces and make it that much more difficult for foreign actors to influence our elections.

(I used to respond to at least the particularly egregious tweets by the Shitgibbon, but then I realized that any response—positive, negative, or neutral—simply feeds his sociopathy. So I've stopped. "Do Not Feed The Trolls" is a perfect strategy.)

I know people say, "Facebook is how I keep in touch with my grandchildren!" or "Twitter is how I stay abreast of events in the world!"—neither of which were apparently possible before the advent of these platforms.

I think social media in general—once a fun, positive way of bringing people together—has become a scourge. We've become so addicted to the release of adrenaline and noradrenaline from being outraged at what other people are saying or doing online that we can't tear ourselves away from our devices long enough to remember that there is real life outside the confines of our screens. Nope, we have to tap-tap-tap that vein.

And as I recently reminded Ben—after he was called to the carpet professionally because of something he posted on Facebook—not all the "friends" in your social media circle are truly your friends, or even have your best interests at heart.

I quit Facebook nearly 5 years ago and it took months for the itch to reactivate my account to go away. Nowadays I go onto Twitter maybe twice a week for only a few minutes at a time before I'm overwhelmed by the overwhelming stupidity of humanity on display. (But TBH I do enjoy the comedic antics of the residents of Vaca Muerta Estates so I keep it around just for that.) While I have loved the photography on Instagram all these years, I'm ready to drop it as well because it seems that lately all I do there is block bots and unwanted ads for crap that wouldn't sell from a Sharper Image catalog.

So if all those "services" dropped off the face of the earth tomorrow I'd undoubtedly go through a bit of withdrawal and I might feel a small tinge if loss at not being able to easily ogle handsome men showing off their impossibly toned bodies in trendy worldwide locations, but my life would go on.

Your thoughts?